A
female
age
,
*oncretepanther
writes:Hi everyone, I am so disillusioned with internet dating. Over the past few years I have joined a few dating websites hoping that at some point I will meet a man, who I get along with, have similar interests/humour, share the same values in life, who is unattached and available for dating, possibly long term romance - monogamous. WRONG! So far, in the last 2 years I have not encountered one man that was looking for the same/similar things as myself. I have only encountered men that lie about their single status and are only looking for some fun behind their wife/partner's back, lie by stating that they are looking for long term relationships when all along they only want sex, Lie about thier age by 10yrs.As far as I can see, it's all about sex and that's it! Don't tell me I'm on the wrong websites, because I've tried reputable (paid sites), and reputable (free sites), and well, I must be very unlucky because I have not encountered any genuine men so far. Sadly, I think internet dating is 90% sex, 8% don't know what they want, and 2% are looking for a serious relationship, but finding that 2% is like looking for a needle in a haystack. I've been single now for 7yrs But I still think its time I closed my account and give up on internet dating, and Spontaneously meeting a guy in a bar, resturant, shop, or taking up a hobby like cookery/photography class etc etc etc and getting along, just does not happen to me. Is it me, Am I doing something wrong/or is it just too easy for guys to have their cake and eat it these days? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, concretepanther +, writes (1 November 2012):
concretepanther is verified as being by the original poster of the question Thank you for your responses.
Your advice is note worthy, and I think for me, the best advice to take away from all this is: 'to stop looking anywhere, but don't give up'.
Best wishes,
A
reader, anonymous, writes (28 October 2012): Guyz tend 2 give up when they are almost about to succeed.i am also tryin to get my luck,it's never too late to try.
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A
male
reader, Htsn47  +, writes (26 October 2012):
 It can work, but you what you say has some truth to it. I think it's harder for women than men.
I met my wife through online dating and we never would have met otherwise. I know she was ready to give up on online dating too, but we are both very thankful she didn't.
If you are feeling burnt out and jaded, maybe you should take a break for a little while. You might not be putting your best foot forward if you are tired of the whole thing.
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A
female
reader, malvern +, writes (26 October 2012):
 Internet dating - it's all about separating the wheat from the chaff! I've met a lovely man through internet dating. We've been together 3. He's actually widowed which is better in some respects as there is no ex wife lurking in the background. Prior to meeting him I met several others but never actually went out with any of them as there was no spark. A friend of mine also met her partner in this way and I've never seen her look so happy, so there are some nice men out there. I suggest you keep looking. If you're closer to the 50 age group then I suggest you try ballroom dancing which is very popular with the 45+ age group amongst singles. I have met partners that way as well and could have re-married several years ago if I'd wanted to. French Jive (often called ceroc, pronounced sir-ock) is also poular with the late 30 upwards age group and that's very much a singles activity. So don't give up because one day you will meet somebody you really like.
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A
female
reader, oldbag +, writes (26 October 2012):
 Hi
There are always exceptions to the rule but on the whole I think your right. I tried for a while a few years back and gave up,always said I would write a book about some of the dates. The men pretty much had one thing in common,they wanted sex, I didnt offer it,hint at it,wear provocative clothes or have bikini shots on my profile.That didnt put them off though.
I did meet one or two who were ok but they weren't for me.
Thing is if you do or don't 'put out' then they have a wide selection of choices to move on to. If they dont want a relationship they can find women at the click of a button.Its easy for them to live their single or married lives without commiting.
I don't know what the answer is,maybe to stop looking anywhere, but don't give up.If your open to meeting somebody are relaxed in mens company then it can happen.The one I am seeing is nothing like my usual and hes great so far, he asked me out and I thought, why not.
You do get used to being single its hard to adjust to being a 'couple' again but if they have the patience its worth it
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A
male
reader, MikeEa1  +, writes (26 October 2012):
 I have been doing internet dating for 2 years now. i have met a lot of people and only had sex with one of them. i have been looking for someone special. I have also been a member of a couple of social clubs but the internet dating seems better for meeting people. there's a couple of problems though. one is expectations. I think mine were often too high. another is that it is too easy to move on and another is that if you do meet someone after being alone for a while it is hard to move out of your comfort zone.it will happen but although man and women have different expectations you'll get what you want if you go about it the right way.
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