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male
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anonymous
writes: I am a guy born and brought up in Asian culture and influenced by western culture, especially American. Though my upbringing was in humble background, I always fancied the boldness of life of people in West. I aspired to be one of them. Somehow, I have realized that I couldn't match up and now I have lost connection with my own roots and hung up somewhere in between. I am confused about myself and my identity as I can't relate with people from my culture nor I can readily accept the values of western culture now that I have lived in that. Please advise. Reply to this Question
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reader, pops +, writes (15 October 2005):
it takes a lot of courage to leave your family, culture, and familiar surroundings behind and start a new life in a new culture, with new friends, and a different way of life. People have been coming to America for Thousands of years to do the same thing, and we usually only consider the plight of those who have arrived in the last 239 years that we have been an independent nation. You are not the only foreigner who has found it difficult to fit in. Emerse yourself in the new society. Do more things, experience more places and people. I recently read a commet from a Japanese American who finally figured out he was an American. When he heard people talk of Washington, Jefferson, Franklin, Adams, Madison, and the other founding fathers, he finally accepted them as HIS founding fathers too. I don't know how he got there, but if you have chosen to live in the USA, then become a citizen. Take the darn courses you need to do it, and use what extra time you have to travel and exporience the variety of cultures that are America. If you have not traveled to the American West, you owe it to yourself to do so. The West has a way of even changing most other Americans who were born here. The wide space, tall mountains, and the vastness makes all your problems seem very petty by comparison. How do you keep your old culture? Write, call, text, email, and visit your family back home when you can. Invite them to see you here. When you can visit, see your friends and visit your old familiar haunts. They will have changed, but they will also be the same. You can't ever get rid of being homesick, but you can learn to keep it in a smaller place in your life by doing what you set out to do, which is to make a new life in your new country. God bless you for trying. It is immigrants just like you that have helped make America great.
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