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female
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anonymous
writes: OK, I am junior who is in love with my teacher. I think he's the one or something. I think about him all the time. I liked him for almost 6 months. I really like him. I want to be with him I also want to let him know how I am feeling inside but I am afraid that my love will be rejected. My teacher is only 15 years older than me but I really care and love him. He is not married and he doesn't have a girlfriend, but he does have a son. Him and I are also in another race. What should I do? Should I tell him how I'm feeling or get over with it, cause I can't.
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (27 February 2006): get a life. how could you fancy a teacher your one sick girl who wants her mind washing and needs to take another look at that teacher. He may even have a wife so ha. Yuor gonna get battered
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (23 February 2006): i am in the same situation, i know how you feel and it is love!
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (2 February 2006): I really do sympathize with you there! I’ve also fallen in love with my teacher (however I’m 18 and know my teacher on a personal level), but from what you have said it sounds like a crush, you admire this man, and find the way he treats you like an adult attractive, this is how a teacher is suppose to act, he may be very different out of school.I don’t think it would be a good idea to tell him how you feel that may put him in an awkward situation, nothing can legally happen between the two of you. At least not until you leave school. Try and concentrate on someone else
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (2 February 2006): Hi there sweety. Don't worry about this... it's perfectly normal to have a crush on a teacher. people do all the time! I did with one of my teachers. I agree with Bev Conolly on this one, they do blow over, I promise. I thought mine never would but it did eventually, and then trust me, you are glad you didnt say anything. All the girls fancy one of our PE teachers at our school, its perfectly normal! xx
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A
female
reader, Bev Conolly  +, writes (2 February 2006):
 It would be a terrible mistake to tell your teacher about the way you're feeling.
What you have is a crush, and they're so common that probably every grown woman you've ever met could tell you the same story. Maybe a couple of girls in 100 go through school without falling for one of their teachers. Maybe not even that many. (Personally, I was totally smitten by my 10th Grade Geography teacher, Mr Bishop.) And it definitely feels strong, but it's just a superficial attraction, which you'll learn to distiguish from love as you get more experience in relationships in years to come.
I don't mean this to sound patronising; it's really not meant to. But the actual truth is that crushes blow over, usually as soon as you stop seeing that particular person every day.
There's nothing wrong with having a crush, either. They feel great and fun and exciting. It's just that you don't have to tell the object of your affection every time you feel that way. Sometimes it's poor choice to mention it, and this is one of those times.
Furthermore, there's a justified social bias against teachers who become involved with their students. Romance and/or sex with a student, or even a former student, is a career-killer for any teacher (even considered a crime in some places), and I can promise you with my hand over my heart that there's no future with him, as long as you're his student, regardless of his marital status.
Maybe when you finish school in a year or two, you could check back, but even then, it's frowned upon. Besides, I'm willing to bet in another 2 years you'll have gotten right over him.
Since there's absolutely zero chance of a relationship with him right now, any admission you'd make about romantic feelings would only make the student-teacher relationship awkward, and put him in the harsh spotlight with his peers and the community, because of a suspicion he'd have been "grooming" you for sex. Every comment and action over the last years is going to be analysed to check out if he's a pedophile. It's a horrendous ordeal (which, incidentally, happened to my innocent brother who teaches high school in the USA). You really don't want to put someone you care about through that!
The short answer is Yes, you can get over this. Recognise it for what it is: You have a crush. It's not love, since you don't have anything more than a platonic relationship with him, and he's not in a position to return any of your feelings. And likely as not, if you were to transfer to another class and not see him every day, the strong feelings would evaporate in a few weeks or months. Save your feelings of love for someone who can return them, and spend more time with friends, both boys and girls. If you don't allow yourself to moon over an unfulfilled fantasy about him, you won't find it so tough to shake off.
Be strong and be realistic!
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