A
female
age
30-35,
*xInItForLovexx
writes:I just dont know what to do anymore.I love someone even though I know I cant have her cause shes my bestfriend and we all know how that ends. Shes going through some pretty rough shit and all I wanna do is be there for her. Problem is I listened to what was going on and then I started suffering. I think Im depressed. I cry when theres nothing to be upset about and frequently. Ive been cutting myself. She blamed herself when she saw me but I lied and said it wasnt true.I get confused about her, shes cuddly and we mess around she used to say i love you when i said it to her, she doesnt anymore though. Im not sure whats real and whats fake. I get moments where I involuntarily just shut down, it doesnt matter who Im with or where I am. I crawl up into a ball and loose myself, nothing and no one matters, I realise this is quite unhealthy. This is the thing that replaces my love for her.Its pretty much like I release myself from my body and just hover over it and watch myself and become numb.Its sort of a weird feeling. I tried to tell a teacher how I was feeling cause I thought I could trust her but she decided she wouldnt help then she changed her mind, but too late. I feel so uncomfortable around her that I wont even stand to be in the same room as her. I just leave, which is a problem cause shes teaching me history this year and shes the only teacher qualified for it at our school so I cant escape her. Im totally at a lost what to do. I cant get over any of this and no one I thought I could trust is making it any better.So I guess my questions are:What do I do when the one and only thing Im staying alive for doesnt even know the way I feel about her (ruling out the fact of me telling her, cause I had this discussion with my friend last night and she said it wasnt a good idea)Secondly How do I overcome this immense feeling of sadness when I cant even stop myself from shutting down.(I have to rule out doctors and such sorry cause its better my family doesnt know how I feel)Were from a broken family if you get my drift.And thirdly what the **** am I gonna do about the whole teacher thing. I found out shes been stalking me at school and asking other teachers about my life etc. On occasion shes been very *unproffesional*. Little comments like "Ive been thinking about you alot lately" and being quite nosey into my personal life and touching my hands when weve been talking. Its just creeping me out now and yeah help please!
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best friend, depressed, I love you, stalking Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (15 January 2010): y u just tell her about ur true feelings.u cant just keep cutting ur self away from her everytime and live in sadness.its now or never.
about ur teacher give her a fake story that u hav a gf or complain to the principle
A
female
reader, xxInItForLovexx +, writes (3 January 2010):
xxInItForLovexx is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI cut her off completely as of last night. She wrote on her fb profile that she loved a boy. I pretty much went distraught and cut her loose completely. Im scared of what Im going to do to myself. I came close to cutting myself again. I hate it. thanks I hope your situation turns out in your favour.I just need to worry about the second and third part now. Thanks
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (2 January 2010): I hav the same problem for the first bit but not the rest, allthough I am withdrawn pretty much any time my opinion or feelings are being asked. With the first question, i think that if there is no way that you can tell them how you feel then just build and keep your friendship up and running. If another person comes into the picture than try to be happy for her, I find that if she's happy then I'm happy. I'm sorry if this doesn't help.
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