A
female
age
30-35,
*indaloo
writes:HiAdvice please- I've been seeing this guy for about 3 months now and he used to reply straight away and now he waits days and says sorry he's been really busy. I really like him, I assume he likes me and wants to carry on seeing each other, but how do I find this out? I try start conversations, but he doesn't really reply. It's like I sent him a message and he read it on sat and still not heard from him. I don't want to be wasting my time if he's not interested. So should I ask to meet with him again or ask him by messaging him what he thinks about 'us'...any suggestions?? Thanks Reply to this Question
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female
reader, Honeypie  +, writes (10 November 2015):
 I agree, this is a case of... he is just not that into you.
I can see someone after YEARS of being together not taking the time to read and respond to a text fairly fast. Now there can of course be circumstances where a person can't text back asap, like in a meeting, a shower, the phone is charging, they are out to dinner with family and/or friends... etc. But then it's really a one off if they don't reply. It's not a constant thing.
I agree with Tisha that you need to stop texting him and get busy with your life. If you haven't heard from him in a weeks time, then consider yourself single. Feel free to delete his number and move on.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (10 November 2015): Don't wait days for responses. He's not as into you, as you're into him. It's only been 3 months, and that's when most relationships run hot and heavy. He's stringing you along, and is probably seeing other women. If you're the clingy sensitive type, he doesn't know how to break it off.
He's waiting for you to give-up in frustration; so he doesn't have to look like a jerk dumping you. Worse comes to worse, he will blind-side you and do just that.
Do yourself a favor, block his calls and move on.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (9 November 2015): This sounds like me. I was seeing a man for about 3 months too, and he would take hours and hours and sometimes a day to reply! I believe no one is ever too busy to check their phone and reply to them within a reasonable amount of time - unless his work commitments prevent him doing so, which is understandable. The ball is in his court; don't invest in him emotionally and maybe see other people.
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A
female
reader, Tisha-1 +, writes (9 November 2015):
 It sounds like the ball is in his court to send a message.
You assume that he likes you and wants carry on seeing you, how you find this out is by allowing him to make the moves to arrange dates and start conversations.
Sadly, in my opinion, I think he's not as interested in you as you are in him. I would stop messaging him and stop "rowing the relationship boat" as another auntie on here would say.
I would get very busy with other friends and I would definitely put myself back on the market if he hasn't contacted you in a week's time or asked you out again. You've only been seeing him for 3 months, and you aren't officially together, right?
Let him make a move next and if he doesn't then make the assumption that he's not serious about pursuing a relationship with you.
Good luck!
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A
male
reader, devont +, writes (9 November 2015):
 I would suggest asking him to meet you again, you should be able to judge how into you is in person. If he wants to carry on seeing you he'll be keen to meet up. He might genuinely be busy right now.
However, I would say that not replying to a message sent on Saturday isn't a good thing. It takes literally seconds to send a text. In my books, there is no reason not to text someone back the same day, even if it's just to say 'sorry, really busy, text soon'.
If he doesn't commit to meeting up or keeps postponing or doesn't seem interested, it might be time to move on.
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