A
male
age
41-50,
*ayJay101
writes:I broke up with my ex fiance about a year ago to date and have cut communication for about 5 months now, but i recently found out she was asking about me. She was asking if i was dating and talked to my sister about how much she missed me, and regrets breaking up but i have not received a call or any contact from her. Basically a long story short i moved to LA from Chicago to be with her, and the relationship not working was my fault i was immature and not responsible and trust issues. I have made a decision now having lived in LA a year by myself that it would be in my best interest to move back to Chicago soon, it is so hard being here alone so i have made my decision its going to hurt leaving but i have to do it. After the news i heard that me ex-fiance was asking about me i was happy but heart broken that she did not contact me after she told my sister she would, so now before i leave i want to write her a letter saying my last goodbye and also wishing her happy birthday because its coming up also, but i just want help on what i should write in my letter?? dear cupid u guys have been my support since my breakup here alone in a strange city, and now i ask you guys what should and should i not write in this final letter i am going to send my ex-fiance as my final goodbye which i need to do to get closure........
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broke up, fiance, immature, my ex Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (7 July 2011): Faint heart never won fair lady
If you trully want this girl back - which I reckon you do
Tell her
Not in a letter - face to face
Then you can get back or move on - but if you don't say anything you will pine for her or what might have been - or not and never be at peace.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (7 July 2011): the relationship's already over, it has been for a year. So what's the point of any letter now? rather anti-climatic.
the time to write a letter would have been one year ago. now, it will just fall flat.
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A
female
reader, sammy1986  +, writes (7 July 2011):
i wouldnt write a letter to her if you split up a while ago what is the point in going over it all again and just hurting youself and your ex again
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (7 July 2011): Yes I would drop the letter idea. Only write to her if you want her back- which I think you do- in which case don't play games by writing goodbye.instead just send a birthday card with a simple happy birthday love jayjay inside. If she misses you like she says then she'l get intouch. If not then you've spared yourself some dignity.
If you do choose to write the letter, write down all your hurt and anger etc then burn it! Then you will have closure.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (7 July 2011): I think it would be better if you didn't' write any letter at all.
why? I mean, really. you've already broken up for a year and you've mentally moved on. what purpose would a letter serve?
so what if you heard she's been asking about you? You've already broken up long ago and moved on so what she thinks should be of no consequence to you.
don't go backwards in your "moving on"
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A
female
reader, Aunty BimBim  +, writes (7 July 2011):
 To be honest I would not be writing the letter. Your ex may have simply have responded to your sister to either be polite or non committal, in much the same way we sometimes tell people "we must catch up" knowing that we probably wont.
Just drop the letter idea, if you really want to wish her happy birthday, buy a card and write in that, something along the lines of "dear XXX, I hope your birthday is all that you wish for. I'll be moving back to Chicago soon, look me up if you are ever that way,
best regards from
Jayjay"
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