A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes: Hi there, I hope to get some good advice/opinions.I have been seeing a man for 8 months, spending weekends together and having a fantastic time. We have a holiday booked together in the summer with my children and he is very relaxed and happy with the relationship. We speak daily on the phone as we live a distance apart and he's also very affectionate and loving but hasnt been able to tell me he loves me. I have recently told him that I love him, and a few weeks later I did say I was a bit scared ( about booking a holiday) as I didnt know how he felt about me. He told me not to be scared and that he just needed a bit of time as he'd been heart broken by his ex ( they broke up about 14 months ago - 6 months before meeting me having been dating for 3 years). He also said I meant a great deal to him and he is very happy with things.Should I be worried that he's on the rebound or is he just being cautious and I should be patient. I am worried that if he doesnt love me by now will he ever.Were both late thirties, he has no children and has been divorced about 4 years- same as me.
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broke up, divorce, his ex, long distance Reply to this Question Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, emad khan +, writes (6 March 2008):
take things slowly. space is important, and developing a strong friendship.I can tell you from my own experience, after having my heart broken- i have not been able to get near anyone. I was briefly with a woman for 2 months, but I broke her heart, simply because i was not able to share her feelings. I let her go, because I knew I couldn't, or was not capable of love yet. Its been 2 years since It happened, and I can tell you, that it will take me some time more before I can have a loving relationship again. Trust is important. But also, you just can't take things too quickly. Things have to develope over a period of time. I think the key may be to have as many good times as possible with this person. Romantic conversations, dinners, etc...eventually, this can grow into something substantial. But I believe that the doorway to love, is this romantic courting period. Eventually the pain that he underwent in the past, will be like a bad dream, and now finally, thank god hes awake! Well, thats my two cents. Good luck
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