A
male
age
30-35,
*rdinaryguy7
writes:So iv known this girl for about 2 years and she lives not long away from me but last night I spoke to her for hours ( well ...all night... :L ) ... When she laughs I can't help but smile and imagine a gorgeous smile to go with it ... The problem is that another girl broke my heart about 2 months ago ... Am I just feeling this to get over the last girl or is it different? I admit I liked this girl before but we have y actually met ... Is it just a phase or a rebound so to speak? Or is this a new like for someone else??? Any help would be appreciated and feel free to pm me if you would profer it :) thanks!! Reply to this Question
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reader, Ordinaryguy7 +, writes (7 January 2013):
Ordinaryguy7 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you :)
A
female
reader, YouWish  +, writes (7 January 2013):
 I have to answer this question to you with a question. The main question is, are you over the girl who broke your heart? Leave the new girl out of it for a second. Are you over the one who broke your heart? If the answer is yes, then we can move on to this new girl. If the answer is no, then you're not ready to jump into a new relationship.
I say that because I actually think your feelings for this new girl aren't a rebound thing, but you might have an issue of emotional baggage that needs to be resolved before you can go forward with this new one. Another reason I think your feelings aren't rebound is because you've known of her for 2 years, which is longer than a mere rebound issue. You didn't go running after her in response to a breakup, but rather once you had your breakup, you're not free to experience emotions for people now that you're available.
I say that unless you're not over the girl who broke your heart, that two months is okay to explore how you feel. This is two separate things, and the last thing you want to do is become involved with the new girl only to break HER heart when your baggage interferes with the progression of your feelings and the relationship, like a fear of commitment or the breakup girl trying to re-enter your life.
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A
male
reader, Darrell Goodliffe +, writes (7 January 2013):
 The thing with rebounding is that while it sometimes is a bad thing to do (not always, but most times) it is also part of the healing process. Developing feelings for somebody else is part of moving on, at least it can be. So, yes its possible these are rebound feelings but that doesnt make them automatically a bad thing. However, you have to be careful with this one since you havent met her. The thing about not having met her is the danger is shes an empty glass - you can make her what you want to be in your own mind and fall in love with that. However, that maybe a long way from the reality of how she is as an actual person. You said it yourself 'you imagine a gorgeous smile' - ie, you dont know its gorgeous to you - it may not be. I think you need to meet actually so you can start dealing with the reality of this person before you start falling too deeply in love with the idea you are creating of her and how she is in your head. Tread with care and handle with caution.
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