A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Lately I've been feeling lonely relationship wise. I'm 27 never had a boyfriend or any sort of relationship. I have many friends but I just dont get attention like that. I'm not the most feminine girl and things like that. My friends think I'm happy, I'm a private person so I dont really talk about my relationships with my friends. They never question if I'm talking to anyone, but I'm not and as I get older I'm worried I'll never find love. I'm wondering what's wrong with me personally I'm just being myself do I have to change to be loved.
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (14 August 2019): Do you want to change yourself OP? You can if you like, but you do not have to change. You do need to socialize either in public venues or on social media. Are you happy just as you are, or do you wish that you could learn to be more feminine? Confide in a trusted girlfriend as to what you want. There must be no sexual attraction between you and your trusted friend, otherwise you friend would have and ulterior motive, not being objective, for your own best interest. Trust me young lady, there is a fella out there, for you! How do I know? My lady is a true tomboy who has seven brothers! Growing up it was tree climbing, camping, and American football! She still loves sports and follows all the scores daily. She also turns heads anywhere she goes wearing black stretch legging or a mid thigh length skirt. She wears a B cup, so when we go out on weekends, she enjoys going sans bra to be flirty and tease me and sometimes even sans panty! My lady can rock my world in bed too! We love and are committed to one another
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (13 August 2019): You can't sit around waiting for love to come to you. You need to get out there and find it. Sign up to some dating apps, join some clubs, ask your friends if they have anyone they can set you up with. If you see a guy you like, give him your number. He might not call but what have you lost? I don't think you have to change yourself entirely but when you go on a date you should make a bit of an effort and maybe that means being a little more feminine than day-to-day
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A
female
reader, Youcannotbeserious +, writes (13 August 2019):
 If you always go to the same places, you will always see the same people. If you always go with friends, that instantly makes you less approachable.
Have you considered actually "putting yourself out there" and trying on-line dating? Or, if that seems like too scary a step for you, what about getting involved in something which interests you? What is your passion? Getting involved with something which really interests you can be a fantastic way of meeting new like-minded people. It could be anything from amateur dramatics to sport to charity work (or, indeed, anything else that "floats your boat").
If we want different results from life, we have to start doing things differently.
Good luck.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie  +, writes (12 August 2019):
 You say you don't get attention.
Do YOU ever approach a guy you are interested in? Do you go out (not just at bar or clubs) and MEET new people?
When you say you are a private person does that mean when you ARE out and about your are not very approachable?
I was NEVER the "most feminine girl" either. Tomboy for sure. Nor was I super pretty either. I am pretty average. But 2 of the 4 men I have dated in my life, I approached. Because I wanted to get to know them better.
The only one holding you back is you.
Why not join either a club, sports, gym or try do some meetup group in your area?
And DO talk to the friend you TRUST the most about how you feel. Who knows maybe THEY know of a guy who might be right up your alley.
TELLING a friend that you worry about these things is NOT being weak or oversharing. IT's exactly why people (in general) HAVE Friends! Otherwise if you CAN NOT share yourself and your feelings (nothing romantic or sexual here) with friends HOW are you going to do so with a partner? You can have PRIVACY in a relationship but being PRIVATE won't do so great.
I don't think there is anything "wrong" with you per se. You just need to learn to open up a little. Let people in.
Try new things, OP. MEET new people.
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