A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Okay so my girlfriend just started college and its all been going good but she has a roomate who has to be the dirtiest w____ of all time she brings over boys and she parties everyday and she doesn't even sometimes sleep in dorm!! I don't care what she does but im scared my girlfriend might be friends with her and they might go out =[ oh and yea the girl parties every damn day and most of the time doesn't even come back and I don't want some of this to rub on too my girlfriend what should I do???
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male
reader, daletom +, writes (25 September 2008):
Yes, your girlfriend IS her own person but at the same time it sounds like you are concerned for her welfare. Are you and your G/F discussing things like "commitment", "marriage", "life partners", etc? If so, you have a right to be concerned.
Your first step is to talk to your G/F about it. If her roommate's behavior bothers her she might be reluctant to bring it up because she's afraid of peer pressure. It is NOT true that your G/F won't be affected as long as she doesn't participate! The situation you describe CAN have an adverse impact on her success at college. University housing administrators will listen to her, and may be able to arrange a room change, if she makes a mature, unemotional case to support such a request.
On the other hand, your G/F may be meeting this challenge very well. You might discover that she is more resourceful and adaptable than you thought. She may have already set some limits to temper the roommate's behavior - for example, an agreement that neither will have guests in the room after some reasonable bedtime hour.
Or, unfortunately, you might discover that your G/F is very much aligned with the roommate's behavior. This is obviously a point of friction between the two of you and could result in changes to one (or both) of you, or your relationship status.
A
female
reader, gemz_louise  +, writes (25 September 2008):
as for the cheeky wee b*t*h below me ignore her.
and as for u just because this girl parties a lot doesnt neccessarily mean that ur girlfriend will copy her and do the same things, even if ur girlfriend does start to party a lot wots the harm in it? better to have fun whilst ur still young isnt it! im sure she wouldnt want u to stay at home with ur cup of horlex and ur newspaper and crossword watching countdown on the t.v. and not going out and makin the most of it. take it easy and chill, she loves u and u love her,nothing to worry about. over and out . xxx
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (24 September 2008): FIRST of all, your girlfriend is her own person, and she can choose her actions for herself. SECOND of all, because a girl parties a lot doesn't make her a dirty w___. I partied a ton in college and I'm a very respected classy young lady. It is common for young adults to do this during their early years of college. Maybe you shouldn't be so judgemental AND maybe you should let your girlfriend make her own decisions.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (24 September 2008): Oh yeah and she brings over guys all the time
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