A
female
age
30-35,
*eachForTheSky
writes:I was talking to my ex the other day n we were gonna make plans to go hiking just the two of us, n he said he'd have to check w/his new gf to make sure she was cool w/it. n I said ok np, do u think she'd be ok w/it or that its weird since im your ex? (we just broke up maybe 1-1.5 months ago). he said idk. she's pretty cool w/stuff like that. We do our own thing but stay cool. But she can't really control me anyway. I said ok just let me know, n he said ok i will. I hope she is (ok w/it) :)Also, right b4 that we were talkin n i said some of the stuff i wanted to do this summer n listed whitewater rafting. N he volunteered to take me kayaking on the delaware "its not whitewater.... or rafting.... but........." is what he said.I think he may still care about me bc of what he said above, and on facebook the only things he has done was comment on my status (i was pondering about what haircolor to have n he said i should "let it grow n go back to my natural color bc I have a beautiful head of hair- why not show that off?")but i know he's been on several times since but the only thing he's done is poke me. He also said if I keep poking him he's going to give me a SUPERPOKE and I said POKE! but didn't actually poke him. Then like two days later, he poked me.On a side note, I can't believe I've become one of those people that wonders if facebook poking really matters...thats just sad.....I keep feeling like the only reason he got another girlfriend is because we can't be together. The choice of girlfriend is also a little weird to me, bc not to be judgemental or anything, but she's...bigger than his past girlfriends. I know for an absolute fact he doesn't like big girls. (he told me, plus his dating history) She's probably a size 12 or 14 and every other girl he's dated has been at max size 6. This girl is also his sister's friend. Don't get me wrong, I don't think that he's using her, bc he did tell me taht she's sweet so it seems he likes her. But i just get a vibe that its not that serious. Maybe its wishful thinking clouding my judgement idk. But how he said that they basically do their own thing, and that she can't control him doesn't really sound like the start of a serious relationship, that coupled w/the fact she's basically complete opposite of his type, and his sister's friend (making it convenient and making his sister happy) it just seems to me kinda like a rebound relationship.... Does it sound like wishful thinking?Any thoughts? I know im grasping at straws, so i need some people to tell me he doesn't have feelings for me anymore (if that is what you think)
View related questions:
broke up, facebook, my ex Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Anastasia  +, writes (4 June 2011):
 Hi, It is cool that you and your ex can still be nice to each other and hang out and stuff and I admire you that you are considerate enough to ask if his new girlfriend is okay with you two hanging out.However, from your letter, I think he is asking for his cake and wants to eat it too. He has a girlfriend but yet still he wants to be around you...only after less than 2 months of breaking up. Maybe not but it appears that he has two books on a shelf...when she is off doing her own thing...let me pick this one...and when this one is off doing their own thing...I'll just go back here. The fact is ..you are an ex...and of course with such a short time after your break up, definitely there will be residual feelings between you two...no doubt about that at all. But ask yourself if you want to be someone's book on a shelf....or the extra girlfriend. Whether or not this girl is a rebound or not, you need to respect the fact that she IS his present girlfriend, regardless of her size or whatever. I think you should not be hanging out with him this much, you will just cultivate deeper feelings for him while he has a girlfriend...and both of you will end up getting hurt really badly. You are exes for a reason.Best Wishes
|
