A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes: hi I'm a pakistani and i had an arranged marriage with my cousin. I didn't like him then and i don't like him now. But still i got married to him out of fear of living alone. Now the problem is he doesn't talk to me like a husband should talk to his wife like in a romantic way niether did he have sex with me. I,m still a virgin he is too. He didn't ask me for our honeymoon. I was so depressed. After 2 weeks of our marriage i told this to my parents and they arranged for us a type of honeymoon away from his parents house where we were living. He fought with me there. But when we got back to his parents house he suddenly asked me lets have sex but he didn't do anything. I told my parents again and after that we got separated. Now it's been 4 months since we have been separated. My family suggested we give him time before we file for divorse. He promised to change. But another problem errupted that he works in another city and i want to move with him away from his family because they are making things very ugly between the two families. He wants me to stay with his parents and win their hearts. I am so disgusted. Now tell me please should i leave him. Should i file for divorse because i have this option open. My family agrees to this. But i'm very confused and scared. PLEASE SOMEONE HELP ME!
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cousin, depressed, still a virgin Reply to this Question Share |
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female
reader, mima +, writes (25 April 2009):
hey sis im a muslim too and i understand your situation, first search ur heart nd see if u luv him nd wldnt mind giving him some time, but d question is does HE LUV U? i guess u knw that youself, i'd advice u to call it off cos he dosent luv u or not comfortable with the arrangement,if he luv u he dosent need 2 b told how 2 show it. i bliv luv shud b mutual b4 marriage, u sit him down ask him 2 tell u honestly how he feels bout u, if he refuses, judge him according to his actions towards you. but am sure u wudnt want to live the rest of ur life in pains. wish ALLAH will help you out,dont forget 2 wake up at midnight and pray over it,ul sure c changes Insha Allah.
A
female
reader, Mikados are lush! +, writes (25 April 2009):
This is quite a serious problem you're in. I dont think I could advise you on it, I dont know about anyone else? But I do know there are helplines for situations like yours, so if I was you I would google for them, and contact them. Apparently they can be very helpful.
I hope you get some peace in your life soon
xxxxxxxxx
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (25 April 2009): I think that you need to take a bit of time to really think about this, and think about what you want. It just sounds as though a lot of decisions have been made very hastily, with regret afterwards.
Deep down, what do YOU want to do? If you are not sure yet, then give it more time. Try not to rush into anymore decisions yet, until you know in your heart what is right for you.
Good luck.
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