A
female
age
,
anonymous
writes:I've known a male doctor for 19 years. He used to treat one of my children and seemed to like my family-anyhow things changed suddenly.Well the behavioural change wasn't that sudden- it changed after my husband suddenly died from mugging wounds-anyhow I later found out that this doctor was deeply upset on returning from attempting to save my husband's life, one of the nurses informed me that he locked himself in his office the whole day and bawled his eyes out.After this he informed me that he can not continue treating my daughter as there is nothing he can do for her JRA- this struck me as abnormal years later, as his policy is to not discontinue treating any of his "children" as he calls his patients, as a result some continue till they are well into their adulthood.2 years ago, he resumed contact and made an appointment to once again see my daughter, he was really looking forward to it, my daughter made a comment on how she has a feeling he will dress smart for the occassion,as if on cue we went to see him, he was dressed smartly from head to toe, he was already seated in his office, and was there way before the 9am appointment. The whole day he was so bright and cheerful-his old self, had a fellow doctor coming over to say hi to his old patient. He made a second appointment with my daughter, when we arrived- he was late, he was walking ever so slowly, and dressed in grey from head to toe- looking absolutely depressed-on seeing us he "forgot" that we were meant to be there, anyhow we saw him and he told us that we don't need to return there- he was cold and actually even a bit rude, however the most astonishing this is that he referred us to the best physiotherapist in town- we get the feeling he has phoned to find out progress.After this his behaviour changed, he seems to avoid talking to me-or any one on one interactions with me, I get the feeling that I make him nervous somewhat. He is unable to make eye contact and sweats profusely and uncontrollably. One minute he is friendly and really eager to see me and comments on how young I still look and literally the next minute he flees from my company a fumbling sweaty mess. Now he avoids greeting me altogether, he avoids me in stores and has stopped going to the same malls I go to(we live in a small town). what could be the problem? Please help as his behaviour is curious to me.I have often wondered if perhaps he doesn't feel guilty about my husband's death-which he couldn't even prevent-obviously due to the extent of the injuries and the fact that he is a paediatrian.
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female
reader, hlskitten  +, writes (24 February 2008):
 I assume he's south african?
My doc was south african, white. I went to him with depression when i split with someone. Basically i ended up dating that doctor and changing gp's! Doctors are people too, and my doc said, people meet people in all sorts of jobs, why should mine be any different.
Der, because it should thats why!
Anyway what im saying is, i think its obvious myself, that he has feelings for you. Thats how im reading it anyway. But maybe hes trying to do the right thing.
Over here we have a code of ethics. I could of had that doctor struck off, after we split (it was only a fling for a few weeks, til i lost my vulnerability!) But i wouldnt of dreamt of doing that. He was in fact, a brilliant doc.
Be interested to see what others think.
C xxxx
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