A
female
age
26-29,
*aula Jackson
writes:I pretended to be a boy for revenge on other girl (sick high school revenge, I am in college now) but ended up meeting this girl from another country meanwhile. We were in love and I told her the truth about who I am. I am gay, and she claimed to be bisexual since we started this new relationship. The point is - she only had intercourse with boys. Since she doesn't have an experience and we live far away, it really gets me if she would like it with a girl. She says yes, but how does she know? she only had sex with one guy, she also said she liked it, but had no love. she likes "doing" it with me because of the emotional connection, but she could fall in love with a boy and have it better, as she knows she likes it. I feel terrible, because she might give up a chance of be fully happy with what she already knows. If she likes boys better, she would do this "sacrifice" to be with me, but I don't want this to be a sacrifice, I want this to end in something even more serious than a girlfriend/girlfriend relationship. I love her so much, and the idea of her enjoying it better with men or doing a sacrifice, taking a shot in the dark kills me. I know there are things more important but this is important as well, that she has her needs fullfield. Also, most of bi woman I know are like 70% men 30% woman. what should I do? she says she wants to marry me, but should I take the risk and actually stop her from being happier in the future? Sorry for the grammar, I am just too concerned about all of this. Besides, I can't be near her, since it is a long distance relationship
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female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (7 August 2013):
 It's LDR which is horrid.
you have never met in real life I assume... so it's always been ONLINE... nothing real. that alone is bad for folks who KNOW what they want but for your gf in the current situation it's worse... she THINKS she knows... but she has no clue till she tries and she may find it not to her liking.
it's a faux relationship at best...
you can't be together,
you haven't met.
I think it would be best to not consider marriage or being serious with this young lady till you two can be together and see if it even works for you.
and if she's truly bisexual (I am) and you marry... how will you feel if she wants to have man time with some guy?
I know my husband would be fine with "us" finding a woman to "play" with but right now since I do not wish to share him with anyone I just go along missing my "girl time".
A
female
reader, llifton +, writes (6 August 2013):
 i don't really understand this weird revenge thing about pretending to be a boy. you mean online, like a chat room or on facebook or something?
anyway, if she says she loves you, then roll with it. stop second guessing everything. most straight people don't need to sleep with a member of the opposite sex to for sure know they're straight. and most gay people don't have to sleep with someone of the same sex to just know they're gay. a big pet peeve of mine is when i'm asked (i'm gay) if i've ever slept with a man before (i have, just not my preference). because they love to say that if you haven't, then how do you know you don't like it? i always have to turn it around and ask them if they've slept with a member of the same sex. if no, then how do they know they don't like it? point being, you don't have to have experienced something to know that it feels right to you. you just know it in your heart.
stop over-thinking and just give this a chance. if it fails, then it fails. just take it one day at a time and see where things go.
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