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female
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anonymous
writes: I have liked my best friends husband ever since they got together. But then they got married and i to was married so i didnt think much of it. Well we have all been really good friends and i have always thought that he liked me from the way that he would act toward me but i didnt think anything of it since we were both married. Anyway they have never got along that great and he has even left her before and the only reason he came back was because his family practically disowned him for leaving the kids. Well my husband passed away a couple of months ago and he has since then told me that he has always liked me and we have been together but i told him that i could not do that anymore because it was wrong. I having been trying my hardest to get him out of my head but i cant. What should i do, if it came down to it should i choose him or my best friend? He has said that he doesnt think they will be together much longer.
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (1 December 2006): Let him split with his wife before you act. Once he's free, he's fair game (not that his ex will see it that way). Plus, if he doesn't split with his wife, then you know he was just using you.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (1 December 2006): You just have to walk away. If they split up in the future then you can go there but not until. DO NOT be the reason for them to split. You can't do this to your best friend. My best friend's husband came on to me last Christmas, i pushed him off and put him straight, and out of my mind. I think you should do the same. Do not hurt your friend, I bet she wouldn't do it to you, so don't. If you have slept with him in the past then forget it, even deny it. If he ever mentions it to her then it is your word against his, deny it.
Keep walking and don't go back there, please.
Take care.
xx
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reader, anonymous, writes (1 December 2006): This is really a spiteful question on your part, it is as if you are looking for permission here to devestate your best friend by betraying your friendship and stealing her man, why would you want a guy that would do this to his wife? If he could do that to her, then you will be the next woman he cheats on and throws away when someone that is so called better comes along.
You don't even seem to be grieving over the loss of your husband if this is all that is on your mind. Please seek some counseling to help you figure out what is going on that you would be so narcissistic as to need the approval of your best friend's man to the degree that you would be overjoyed if he left her for you.
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female
reader, jaynehaigh +, writes (30 November 2006):
Stealing your friends man is always a NO!!!
Friends are always there for you and men may come and go.
So say you steal him, lose your friend, then he goes and does exacly the same to you??
You have no friend or man - thats what!!
I'm so sorry to hear about your husband passing and what I feel is that this man is playing you at a vulnerable time.
Just keep saying no and stay away whenever possible.
I know its difficult and it must be so tempting to take comfort where you can - but if you do you WILL regret it.
Take some time to grieve for your husband and learn to love yourself.
Take care X
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