A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes: My boyfriend and I broke up 8 months ago and have remained close friends. We both date other people, but still hang out alone and end up sleeping at eachother's houses a few times a week. I am truthful with him about what I do, he lies a lot. Everytime I try and put distance in between us, he comes on strong. He says he only wants to be friends, as do I, but I do not understand if thats all he wanted why he would put in the effort to make me feel special, snuggle, etc. Please help, I do not understand men.
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female
reader, hlskitten +, writes (29 October 2007):
I agree with Peoriaman. That book is brilliant to read.Its not easy seeing a guy (or girl) whos automatic reaction is to lie, but if you are only seeing each other, friends w5th benefits type thing, then you have no right to know what he is doing. Thats the downside to fwb unfortunately. But thats also one of the golden rules of it. This guy sounds like he's blowing hot n cold and doesnt know what he wants. Maybe hes a tad immature?You need to be detached enough to not wonder what he is doing. Theres also some benefits to that too! Best of both worlds sort of thing. But its very rare that it works in the long run. Particularly with an ex.Tread very carefully. If there are feelings involved on either side, it can get very messy.Remember also, you dont have to be telling him what you are doing either!Good luck.C xxxx
A
female
reader, rockelle +, writes (29 October 2007):
It sounds like he is trying to keep you happy so that the sleepovers can continue. He is getting his cake and eatting it too. He is continuing his relationship with you without the commitment, and he gets to still have his freedom. If I were you I would stop sleepovers and sex, if you are going to move on move on. If he only wants to be friends, just be friends (Platonic)
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