A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:I am 44 and having a hard time making a decision . I am very full of life and feel as though I am being held back .I will start by telling you that i am married for 28 yrs even though my husband moved out of our home in feb of 2008 and said he wanted a divorce . Here is it 2010 and still no divorce . I have however been seeing this man that has a bad drinking problem and also a mental illness called bipolar and tends to self medicate . I want to be brave and live my life but at the same time my feelings for this man with the drinking problem is pretty strong dont know if it is love or what . I have a good prn job and love my work .I have a wonderful family and know they would be here for me if only i would give them a chance however it seems i spend all my time trying to keep this guy from freaking and making sure he is always happy not thinking about what I feel . I am stuck and dont know what to do i feel i moved on to fast and now im so damn confused and scared . I know its hard to help someone without really knowing them but i feel like maybe i need to head in a different direction and not sure how to do it and be happy , so if there is someone out there that might be able to give me some good advice i would be greatful .
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male
reader, Boombadaboom  +, writes (1 July 2010):
 Seems to me like you need to be the one needing rescue now. Find a guy who'll help you for a change instead of other way around. Eventually you can find balance and be a healthy couple. Divorce or not, it doesn't matter. You're seperated, that's the most important thing. Divorce will come one day, maybe sooner than later. About the new direction, I'm sorry, I couldn't tell you what to do there. Especially since I'm in my early 20's, I have no idea how it must be for you. Just don't settle for anything less than you deserve, that's all I'll say now.
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