A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:heyok so my boyfriend and i have been dating for 8 months now, we had the exclusivity talk 3 months ago and everything is going pretty well between us. he treats me right and is sweet to me. the first 4 - 5 months of our dating period, he was always the one making plans and calling me and texting me and being the perfect guy. then he stopped doing that as much, and that was not fun for me. i tried to talk to him about it but i don't think he got it at all because he didn't start doing it again or anything. (ie calling and texting like he used to) we are both muslim so none of our parents are aware of our relationship and yes we still live with our parents, i am 20 and he is 23. we both work, i do marketing for an IT firm and work till 2pm and he is a jeweller and works till 7 or 8pm everyday. so, since he is too busy to meet in the day time, we go out at night, so i have to pretend i'm with friends to go out with him which is why we can't meet that often, and i can't go partying with him because my parents are not liberal and his are - to an extent. so we normally meet about once a week or once in 10 days, and we chat online almost every day. so i have 2 questions: since i can't go clubbing, he goes with his friends and it doesn't really bother me because i think he can be trusted, he is a very decent guy and we didn't get even slightly physical until like the 5th date, thats the time we first kissed! so he moves slowly!.. but should i be having a problem with this partying thing of his? he goes every saturday and sumtimes on fridays as well. 2nd qn.. he doesn't call me! the nights he is out till late or something we don't meet online so we don't communicate at all those days. he is very laid back, he knows im his girl so i guess he doesn't feel the need to communicate like i do. i'm a very intense and hyper person and i am not ok with this no communication thing! what should i do? should i just call him when i feel like it..? oh and i'm also always the one making plans for us to meet. it has been like this for about 3 or 4 months now.. is that normal?? please help! i worry too much i guess, because like i mentioned in the beginning, he does treat me right, and is sweet to me, he just doesn't call or text me or make plans, but we chat online almost every night so i guess he doesn't feel the need to be communicating on phone. oh, and he is totally not a phone person - when i tell him i was talking to one of my girlfriends on the phone for half an hour he is all shocked. girls: please tell me if this has ever been the case for you and if it is not a bad thingguys: please tell me if you or your friends would be like this with a girl you really likecoz the way he acts wen we are actually together or when we are talking really makes me feel like he really likes me. coz hes sweet!
View related questions:
clubbing, muslim, period, text Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, dapone 1  +, writes (29 October 2007):
 hello
I agree with my friend eve, if you are doing all the running after him then he is making a fool out of you, you need to tell him how you fell then drop this person out of your life for good.
A
female
reader, AskEve +, writes (29 October 2007):
 From what you write it appears that you are far more hooked on him than he is on you. I'm sure other aunts will agree, if a guy likes you A LOT then he will want to call you and make arrangements to see you. This sounds like a very casual relationship to him where he is quite happy to see you if you ask him to, however he's not wanting to go out of his way in that respect and continues to go out with friends and live his life. There's nothing wrong with going out with friends, that's healthy, what I'm saying is he should be missing you more and wanting to get in touch with you by phone or text.
Do you think he's going on his PC to talk with you especially or do you think he's on there anyway and chats with you like he would with other friends? In my opinion you are both adults here so you should be making your own decisions in life and that means being able to see one another when you want to. It sounds to me as if his relationship with you is "luke warm" and not as intense as you'd like it to be.
I would certainly hold back a bit more and see if he makes any effort to call/text/email you first and ask you out, after all it takes two to have a successful relationship. If he doesn't then, you have your answer...
Eve
...............................
|
