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female
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anonymous
writes: Hey, everyone. I’ve been w/ my bf for 4 yrs now. He lives at home w/ his parents and so do I. He’s not the party type; he’s the type of guy that works and goes straight home and once in blue goes to his buddies house and hangout. He and I talk a lot about our future and he tells me he can’t wait to get our place when I graduate which is June of next yr. Everything is going great. We are extremely opened minded. We both enjoy looking at porn. But of course he does that in his house and I do freaky things like that in mines. Our sex is great. I wished we had it more often. We have busy schedules, he works during the week and I go to college full time. At least we get to spend the weekends together. Like a year ago he used to hide the online porn and the playboy mags but we had many fights and we came to the conclusion that there’s no need to hide anything if we are both open w/ one another. Now he’s no longer embarrassed. He makes me copies of porn; we share naughty sites w/ each other. I love it. I sometimes wished my bf told me everything, like for example if he masturbated if so what did he do etc. But the reality of the matter is that no guy or female is going to get into details w/ their partners on when they masturbated and what techniques they used etc. Now the only problem I have is that during the week, when he’s home from work, I call him or he calls me and tells me he’s chilling downloading music and stuff on the pc. I start thinking a lot.. I mean I find myself obsessing a lot about what he’s really doing online. I even start to think, Ok, I bet he's masturbating now. This may seem stupid, but I tend to think about it so much that is stressing me. This is time consuming. I just want to calm down and not think too much. I don’t know what steps to take next to help me ease this anxiety. What should I do?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (16 April 2007): Follow your gut feeling. I did with my husband and I found that he was cheating online
A
female
reader, Astrid  +, writes (6 December 2006):
 probably doin the idiot as most men but do not panic it's normal and a sign of needin to feel young and important but then it's you who's there and just that enjoy the time u have for a bath, shopping etc while he does the idiot on the net
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A
female
reader, Helen1986  +, writes (5 December 2006):
 Hello Hunny.
Technically your boyfriend is doing nothing wrong because you have told him that it is okay to do what he is doing.
I suggest that you sit your boyfriend down and tell him how you are feeling. Tell him that you love him very much and hate the idea of him masturbating over pictures of other women. Explain that you thought you would be able to cope with it because you trust him so much, but now you have realised you cant.
Suggest to him that you watch porn on occations together just to spice up your sex life a bit. Tell him that you will stop watching it alone also.
Hopefully he will understand your feelings and stop what he is doing.
I wish you all the luck in the world hunny
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