A
female
age
30-35,
*lishamarie08
writes:I'm so alone. I know half of this has to do with my actions. But! I'm so alone.Sorry if this is long but I need help!!!!! I don't have a single friend that I could call on if I needed too. I went thru high school with tons of friends and dropped out of the high school marching band for a good reason if I didn't I wouldn't graduate because I was so behind in my schoolwork. But anyways those friends didn't stick with me and called me a traitor because I quit. I graduated and went on to cosmetology school. I made some friends there and graduated from that as well and the friends I met there went there seperate ways. I'm looking for a job as a stylist but the job market is going slow and I'm so lonely and I have no one to spend anytime with. And I'm getting lonely and depressed. I stay at home unless I'm going to go out to find a job. I don't know what to do...HELPP!!!!!!!!
View related questions:
depressed Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (18 July 2009): I understand how you feel. Every few years, I've always get into that slump of having no friends around. My family and I are not close; it's a waste of energy and cause of emtional stress trying to connect to my family (my entire family is basically broken. A long history going back before I was born). As for friends, tons in high school; none stayed with me. Tons in college; none stayed after we all graduated. Inbetween jobs; none of the coworkers that I thought we were close and good friends stayed with me. Trust me, I make many full-hearted attempts to stay in contact with them and keep a postitive attitude. Like the previous posters said, "out of sight, out of mind." Now I'm meeting people online like on meetup.com, okcupid.com, and craig's list. I don't have shame and I shouldn't feel any because I can either stay home all day waiting by the phone hoping a former friend calls or a job offer is given to me (which does slowly eat away at the mind), or I can actually meet and hang out with new people and make potential new friends.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (5 July 2009): for the lonelyness feeling, why dont you spend some time with family? when im feeling lonely i take my little sister to see a movie, and i like to have nice long chats with my mum, i concider my little sister and my mum 2 of my dearest friends, and its not like i dont have other friends i just really love the company of my family perhaps sometimes more than other friends. i play with my dog and take him for walks. During the days when im home and no one is home i just keep myself occupied, clean, hire movies, fix things. make myself usefull, it takes away the lonely feeling a bit, it doesnt help to sit around watching tv all day being bored. To make friends, maybe you should contact one of your old friends, maybe you should put in the effort and ask if they want to catch up for coffee im sure you have an old friends number. Or go online and chat to people who knows you may find a bf/gf they make u feel less lonely, you get introduced to there friends and hit things off. people always come and go throughout your life, dont worry to much you wont be lonely for too much longer someone else will come along, especially since your so young, you need to think positive and love respect and appreciate yourself, because also dont forget you are also your own friend
...............................
A
female
reader, babymama99 +, writes (5 July 2009):
 It sounds like you don't have problems making friends, its just that they are usually at places where you will only be for a limited time (school) and when that time is up you drift apart.
I suggest joining a club or some organization that will put you in line with people who enjoy the same activities you like. for example church, knitting, ball room dancing, bingo etc. this way the people you come into contact with will be people you will see because you have some of the same interests, instead of aquantiances you meet because you happen to be in the same class or such.
A true "friend" is very hard to find. but I'm sure you will be able to find some folks to hang around with and have fun.
In the mean time hang out with us, we'll keep you company :-)
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (5 July 2009): Well, I think your situation is fairly normal. I am the same. I don't know the people I went to high school with or college. I have moved around a lot the last few years and that means that keeping friends has been hard. It is the "out of sight, out of mind" scenario.
Don't feel lonely. There are a lot of people just like you, feeling isolated and afraid to reach out to others for fear of disappointment or rejection. True friends will surface with time and the ones that would call themselves your friend but offer you nothing aren't worth your time right?
I suggest getting involved in different hobbies. Do the things you have always wanted to do. Join a yoga class or pilates. Take a language course. Join a club of some kind. Just don't spent all your time at home feeling lonely because that feeling builds on itself; its like a hole that continues to get deeper and darker the longer you allow it to exist in your mind.
You will make friends the more you add to your list of hobbies, and they will be friends you have something in common with and can socialize with outside of work/school.
Hope that helps.
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (5 July 2009): I know exactly how you feel. But trust me, you are not alone. Go out on the town or to a bar or coffe shop or something. Just try to find out who you are yourself, and others will come to you.
...............................
|
