A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:i get so angry with myself and beat myself up all the time about being socially awkward.I try my best not to be awkward at work but i just cant seem to help it. I'm 25 and have been alone and terribly introvert throughout my life. i can count the number of people i know,they are so less. 1) Half the time i talk to people they say "what" or "huh"?I SRSLY DONT KNOW WHY I DONT HAVE A VOICE! I literally scream in my head when someone asks me "what did you say"? I know the answer is "speak louder" but it just seems so forced and weird when i try, i wish i could just be myself and everyone could listen when i speak. The worst is on the bus or train i just cant seem to be heard over the noises of other people and engine yet when my friend talks i can hear him perfectly, why is this??2) I am terrible at telling stories - every time i speak about myself or something happened people seem to 'tune out" or lose interest 3) I try my best to be 'apart' in group conversations by laughing and smiling at jokes and when people try and be funny but thats all i do i just have no confidence to speak up and add to the convo4) everyime i have to talk to someone i pretty much have to tap them on the arm or something to get their attention so they can listen5)When i say something, they all become silent and burst out laughing! Girls pick up on me just for the sake of fun, and i lose new friends when they come to know the true me after seeing other people's behaviour. Thats so frustrating.For some days i try to act confident and talk less, things seem to turn out all fine and people interested to know me and nobody picking on me anymore. Then suddenly any such event happens and i become depressed for many days and make myself distant from people and become all quiet! I am tired and sick of this cycle. It feels like people wait for me to talk something and are curious to see my reaction(my awkwardness) when they say something to me.i feel dreaded to go to work now.They openly say whatever they want to say or offend me which they wouldnt say to someone else. i hope you understand how the whole picture is. please dont explain me the rules of becoming social like always smiling ,being interested in people and all.. i suppose they dont apply to someone socially awkward and i just want to be "me" anyways6) How do people know what to say ?I know this sounds silly, but my friend who is very confident/sociable always seems to know the right words to say to keep a convo interesting/funny/flowing . How do people do this???????thats pretty much all my problems. I seriously hate my life at the moment im sick of being socially retarted. please help me, the only times i cant talk well is when im drunk :(
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reader, anonymous, writes (12 July 2015): obviously it's worse for guys if you are socially-awkward
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (4 May 2012): I'm really really really awkward around people too until I get comfortable around them. Maybe you just need to try to force yourself to become close with a small group of people so you can open up. When I'm with my friends, I'm much better at being around people i don't know because I usually just talk to my friends and they just join in. Maybe try to even joke about the fact that you're awkward sometimes
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