A
female
age
30-35,
*outhernsweetie15
writes:Hey aunties, uncles, or who ever reads this: I'm a 15 year old girl who's just moved and I just started this new school. Problem is that I'm super shy with people I don't really know (familiarity is where I'm most comfortable)but I'm really outgoing once I know someone a little bit and I really want to meet some more people besides the three or four shy girls that I have been hanging out with but I don't really know how to step out of my comfort zone... I want to be in the outgoing, fun crowd but I don't know how to approach the people and I guess I don't really know what to say... Help?Any new school advise/making friends advise would be greatly appreciated. Thanks! =]
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reader, anonymous, writes (23 August 2008): well i think most people who are decent will appreciate friendliness from newbies A LOT i mean it's hard to find someting to critisize about someone who smiles and acts happy and friendly-but don't overdo it. At first you just have to laugh at peoples jokes even if you dont find them that funny and rememebr stick to the convo topic- if youre a random person (like me!!) and randomly come out with weird unusual stuff they wont know you so they'll probably be freaked out lol wait until you have friends that know you better :D and act INTERESTED in what people have to say cause everyone likes talking about themselves -cant really go wrong there. also youre 15 you know how it is some girls can be PRETTY BITCHY despite what i said above you will get bitches in every school if they're out of order because you're new or a little bit weird or whatever remember stay grounded rise above doesnt matter youre a cool, outgoing girl.--and yeah it is so true BE YOURSELF DONT TRY TOO HARD chillax!!! LOL good luck :D
A
male
reader, pursuit of happiness  +, writes (23 August 2008):
Okay I know its clichéd, but be yourself (unless you want to reinvent yourself - don't over do it, make sure any reinvention is sustainable) and above all be ULTRA confident. Even if no one talks to you on the first day/s just pretend you don't care - like you have a hundreds of cool friends outside of school. Don't over do it, but psychologically you need to give the impression of someone who doesn't need friends, this will make people think you are worth getting to know. Avoid doing anything which will make you a figure of hate - don't answer questions in class too much or be a goody two shoes - if you want to do that, do it later when you have more friends. Obivously don't come across unfriendly or arrogant, if someone bothers to introduce themselves, be friendly, but don't latch right on until you've sussed out the class.
Finally don't waste your time making friends with people just because they are "popular" or "cool", otherwise you could find yourself stuck in the wrong crowd, with all the people you really want to be friends with hating you.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (23 August 2008): Aw well I think you know really it's a feeling everyone has come across. You could try speaking to your teachers, just asking about things that will in happening in lessons later on, about seating arrangements to fit you where you're most comfortable. Also, you could ask them to actually put you in groups with particular people so you can work as a team to get to know your class.
Also just generally being willing to mix, so lending the occasional pen or pencil if someone geniunly needs one but not being a push-over either. Look happy, relax in their company and have a laugh and a joke and you'll soon fit in with new people.
Good luck with your new school!
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