A
female
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*mberBambi
writes:Hey, i seem to have a problem and i feel really alone. I am 18yrs old and week ago i split from my 20yr old fiance. We had been together for nearly 3 years and things had been bad with our relationship for quite a few months. Over the past 3 weeks or so he was going out 3/4 nights a week [we were living together] and would refuse to take me, although guys and girls both went. I am not generally a paranoid person but this unusual behaviour and secrecy worried me and when i confronted him about it, he broke up with me saying there is 'no point if i dont trust him'. A few days after the split we decided to be friends and give it a week or so and then give our relationship another go, and try and work things out. But the day after that i went to visit him early one morning [as he had moved out] and found him in bed with another girl.. i was so broken hearted, after he had declared him undying love to me just the day before [he denied doing anything with her though]. From that day on [3 days ago] i decided that i couldnt be with him again.. but we decided to be friends because of the past etc. I spoke to him today and he informed me that he has a new girlfriend.. and it broke my heart all over again. I can understand how he can move on and replace me so quick.. im completely shattered over this. Did i love him more than he loved me? or is this just the males way of dealing with it? He is currently living at his parents farm, and i keep my horses down there. He says i dont have to move them, but how can i go down there everyday and have to face him and his new girlfriend? he just cant understand why im so cut up about it. Im so hurt over his behaviour, he is so in sensitive and has told me that its 'love at first sight' with this new girlfriend.. he cant seem to realise how hurt i am and cant understand why im going to have difficulty being his friend. can someone shed some light on this situation? many thanks... x
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male
reader, Dr. Reality Check +, writes (18 November 2006):
 To be honest, I think there was probably something going on with him and this girl long before you broke up. He probably met her at one of those nights out you weren't allowed to go to. You deserve much better than this fool.
A
female
reader, AmberBambi +, writes (18 November 2006):
AmberBambi is verified as being by the original poster of the question Thank you Young Aunty Nic, that has made me feel loads better. Today im alot stronger, although im still hurting alot as i think it will still take me a while to get over what he has done to me. I feel as though im the better one at the end of the day, im trying to be independant and atleast i not jumping into bed with the first person that shows me attention! [which is what he seems to be doing]. I WILL find someone who loves me and treats me well, much better than he ever did. Thank you for your advice, its much appreciated. Amber x x
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