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male
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anonymous
writes: right how to explain! im 17 and i broke up with my girlfriend of 14 months a couple of months ago but we were still talkin afterwards and gettin on fine but a couple of days ago i lost my temper at her because i do tend to have a short fuse and now she wont answers my calls or texts and im just feeling so lonely because no matter whats happened i still love her with all my heart and im missing her so much i just want her to forgive me but i don't know what to do please help!!!!
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reader, anonymous, writes (19 November 2006): I agree with Malyce's advice. When I hear a guy state that he "lost his temper at his gf because he tends to have a short fuse and now she won't answers his calls or texts"...I tend to think this is certainly not the first time. It sounds like this anger thing of yours has been a big part of your past history with her in the past 14 months. She's at the end of her rope. You need to do the work of getting that anger under control, before you can ever date...anyone. period. Do the work of seeking anger management courses to help yourself become a more able, responsible, loving person.
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male
reader, Gotcha +, writes (19 November 2006):
a short fuse. Thats lame man. As a guy you should always be gentle with women. A quick temper not only makes you look stupid and trashy but makes you feel like less of a man
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reader, anonymous, writes (18 November 2006): In 14 months...and this is the FIRST and ONLY time you lost your temper? I am thinking probably not and she had reached her limits of tolerance and said Good bye.
I am sure with each episode she told you how she felt about your giving into your temper and letting it rule you...people with anger management issues enjoy giving into their rages as they get a perverse delight in inflicting their rage onto others. This is abuse.
I say you need to get some counsellling to address your anger management issues and your need to be abusive. I say Mom and/or Dad taught this to you as acceptable and they would be wrong; it isn't.
So that would be a start. Do so now as if you don't you will continue to abuse and neglect those you claim to love by letting your anger or "temper" rule your emotions and say unkind, hurtful, hateful words of rage.
Counselling.
Work on improvement. Realize your "triggers" and how to avoid wrong paths of thinking that will fuel your rage.
Let her go. You haven't changed and she will need someone who can be more loving, patient, understanding.
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reader, anonymous, writes (18 November 2006): You dont say how you lost your temper with her if it was words let her calm down, if it was fists sorry but thats it
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