A
female
age
41-50,
*ixieGwen
writes:My ex and I had tried to be friends but some days he was super nice, others he was cold/distant.He acts like I broke up w/ him and he would constantly bring up our relationship - y it didnt work etc, try to make me jealous or compliment me alot - mixed signals.We made plans *he norm doesnt plan or flake* I called to confirm and he never got back.He never gave a reason why he flaked but when I called him on it, he made it seem like he wasnt wrong and said that no one else has complained bout his shitty behavior.We argued - it didnt end well. He's never been mean or flaked on me.Its been goin shitty for him lately.Im not makin excuses but his current behavior is unlike him.I just want us on good terms and I wanna know how to do that.. I recently invited him to my art show *it was a mass email..so it wasnt solely to him* but by doin that - does it show that I dont hate him?I know it silly.. but hes not a mean person - never has been and I dont think we should be in crappy terms.
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reader, anonymous, writes (15 September 2009): Been there--done that! It doesn't sound like you or he is completely past the relationship. Seeing him IS NOT going to help. Back off because he is obviously still angry with you. A lot of spouses never like their x's again. Give him time (years even), and maybe you could come to an understanding. Now is not the right time. Let him come to you.
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