A
female
 ,
*helsea
writes:Hi, I'd love it if someone could help me, I'm being driven insane!There's this guy that I like and I've only seen him around for about a year, and up until about 2 months ago, I never really paid much attention to him. But now he's all I think about! All I know about him is his name, where he works, which car he drives and which football team he supports. That's it. I don't know what he's into during his free time and I certainly don't know how to go about asking him.For weeks I've thought about asking him out because sometimes I think he might be interested in me too, but it's like 50/50. Sometimes he'll look at me in a certain way or smile brightly when our eyes meet, and on the few occasions when we've managed to talk I feel as though he's actually interested in what I'm saying. But then there's been a few times when we could be alone and he'll only make small talk or nothing at all.I have now come to terms with the fact that he might have a girlfriend or simply not interested, so as much as I would hate to be rejected by him, I am prepared. The problem is that I don't know how to ask him out since I don't know what he's into. I've considered asking one of the other guys that he works with if he's single but I'm worried that it might seem pathetic and that he'll hear that I asked. I've thought about walking up to him, asking him if I can ask him something and then say something along the lines of, "I think you're cute. Wanna go out sometime?" but even just typing that then, it seems like a wrong thing to say! I'm going out of my mind, I want to just ask him so it's out of the way and then we can either start dating, or I can move on. But the closest I got to asking him was yesterday and the whole conversation was great and I was just about to ask him and my stomach turned and the words would not come out!Can someone please help me? Would it be lame to ask someone if he's single? And any help on how to get over my fear and just ask him? Suggestions on what to say would be deeply appreciated :D x
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female
reader, Libra1963  +, writes (6 June 2009):
 Why dont you try a group approach and go out as a group and then try to spend time with him alone that evening. That way it wont look so obvious. Its good you know a couple of him friends. You coild even mention that you think he is hot to one of his friends who may put a word in for you.
I am in the same position - I know how hard it is to make the first move.
Best of luck!
A
reader, anonymous, writes (6 June 2009): You could ask someone if he's single but then they could tell him that you asked and then it might seem a bit pathetic. He could be a bit flattered though. The best thing to do though is just strike a conversation with him then just casually ask him out like be talking about something the just casually say, are you doing anything tonight? the see what he says the maybe suggest a place you could go.
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