A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:Ive been seeing a 34 year old guy for two full months now. He treats me well, takes me out to nice places well until i saw him texting other girls on social me. I caught him once flirting with girls the one time we went shopping together. I told him i don't like it. He stopped but now he flirts online. I hate that i told him to stop as if he doesn't know he is not suppose to do that. Im still with this guy but i secretly hate him. He said he will stop flirting online but I should not have went through his phone like that. Wow the truth is he was online and handed me his phone when i suddenly saw conversation of him and other girls. I hate that im feeling like an idiot right now. This guy already has brought up marriage topic and through our conversations he has agreed that he believes in polygamy "just that he is a Christian" so he won't do it. Im ready to leave but how can i take my dignity with me?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, TrueLoveWaits2016  +, writes (24 August 2017):
If you want to preserve your dignity, walk away and don't look back.
A
female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (22 August 2017):
 I don't see what dignity has got to do with your predicament.
He is a flirt- you want somebody serious, committed and only focused on you.
You told him to stop- he did not stop.
You used to like him, but now you secretly hate him.
Why can't you just accept that you gave it a try, and it did not work ? That's what dating is for- to see if two people are basically compatible; and you aren't, because of behaviours that are inacceptable to you.
Now, some women might be not fazed by a bit of flirty banter, and be ok with tolerating it / ignoring it. Some, instead, like yourself, would consider it a big dealbreaker.
Now, it does not matter who's right who's wrong. The point is that if this is a dealbreaker- well, your " deal " is over and now you can go. Head up high. How in the world
would your dignity be compromised ??
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A
female
reader, NORA B  +, writes (22 August 2017):
It seems for your mail this guy is not ready to settle down and be happy with one girl...or maybe this is just the type he is.Either way it is not good for you.Words used in your mail like...hate..flirting..leave.....these words speak as you feel.By virture of the fact that he mentioned marriage as a topic....means nothing..it will not change his behaviour of ...flirting.....a ring will be no big deal to him.In this situation You are Not the person in the wrong..you are hurting and confused.There is no reason at all that you cannot leave this situation with dignity.It would be wise to move on and meet someone who will respect and love you and only you .Kind wishes NORA B.
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A
male
reader, Allumeuse  +, writes (22 August 2017):
I think you keep your dignity by leaving. It doesn't matter how. If you're looking for a pithy remark to depart with I'm sure the guys below can help you out. This man boy is making himself look foolish all on his own though
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