A
female
 ,
anonymous
writes:Im 25 years old and this week found out im pregnant. Its by my ex, who Ive been with on and off for 3 years. Each time we got back together we would be happy for a few months then he would leave me for someone else. I would always be stupid and take him back cos I really love him. We split up again about 5 weeks ago and he is now seeing someone else. So Ive told him Im pregnant and he has been really good about it. He said he will support me in whatever I decide to do. He said he is not ready for children but will be a good father if i decide to keep it. I do appreciate him being like this but the only thing that is getting to me is that he wont finish with this girl hes with. Weve decided to keep it a secret til we know what we are doing, so she doesnt know about it. But I think, out of respect, he shoud finish it anyway whether Im keeping it or not as I really need him around right now. But then I think, am I only telling myself this cos I still love him and want him back? Im so confused and scared. I have already said to him I want to get back with him but he doesnt seem keen and I know he really likes this new girl. What should i do?
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male
reader, Ladybug08  +, writes (12 September 2008):
Your responsibility is to this baby. You need to prepare for being a single parent and stop worrying about who he is dating. His track record has already proven to you that he is not a good partner and can't be trusted to be faithful to you. If he turns out to be a good parent then that is all that matters but persuing a romantic relationship with him is just setting yourself up for more pain. If he want's to be a parent, invite him to your prenatal check ups,see how responsible his is,, before the baby comes..That will indicate to you how prepared he is to be a dad. Futhermore, don't have this baby because you think that it will get him to back to you. It wont.
A
female
reader, Emilysanswers +, writes (12 September 2008):
He doesn't have to do anything I'm afraid. Gone are the days when he would have to marry you to do the "honourable thing."
He can be a good father to the child while being with his new girlfriend.
I know you love him and want him back but I think you know deep down by now that he doesn't love you. He's left you so many times, and you kept taking it back and it didn't work. If you get him back now it will be exactly the same as last time, he'll leave you for someone else by Christmas.
You are going to be a single mother so you need to learn to stand on your own two feet and get over this guy. He's used you enough times. You need to stop concentrating on him and do what is best for you and the baby.
Good Luck!! xx
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