A
female
age
36-40,
*rulove's_kiss
writes:Dear cupid.I been dating my boyfriend for nine months now.At first he was the best.Now he acts different towards me and my family. He seems so cold like he doesn't care about nothing.He says he is hard on me to make me stronger, but its only breaking me more and more. I'm more depressed when ever and i take care of his son when he works, but he don't even care about that. He says i need to start working, but i quit my job to be with him. He always text his ex girlfriends and i'm suppose to just be okay with that? i looked in his phone one day and i saw that he told his ex that she will always have his heart...... what am i suppose to do i think? I'm pregnant and i dont know if we are gonna make it i need help please?
View related questions:
depressed, ex girlfriend, his ex, text Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (18 October 2012): Wipe the dust from your feet and move on.
I realize this must be hard to read - but no, your relationship is going nowhere.
He has sociopath tendencies and by your description, I would say his only concern is himself.
A real man would not do something which he knows is intentionally hurting the one he loves. He'd protect her, and her feelings at almost any cost.
Also the fact that you found that text to an old flame would indicated that he's already cheating on you in his heart.
Drop him like the deadbeat he is - and raise that child in a more suitable and responsible home atmosphere. He's not fit.
A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (18 October 2012):
 Did you get pregnant on purpose or was it an oops? Because getting pregnant by this guy makes no sense at all.
You have only known him 9 months and he is ALREADY treating you like dirt.
I think he does as he pleases and has you for his doormat, because he knows you will do anything to make it work. When he finds someone he likes better he'll drop in a heartbeat. Then it;s you and the baby.
My advice, DO get a job, ask your family for help with the baby and move on. He doesn't seem like a very good partner at all. Learn to stand on your own two feet and don't let a guy treat you in a way you don't WANT to be treated. He isn't your DAD so the whole.. "I'm trying to make you stronger" is BS. That is not HIS job that is YOUR job to work on.
And he is still carrying a torch for his ex.
Good luck.
...............................
A
female
reader, k_c100  +, writes (18 October 2012):
 To be honest I dont think this can work I'm afraid - it sounds like he is still in love with his ex and is just using you. The pregnancy is unfortunate, you must have got pregnant very early in the relationship so there was never any time to get to know each other and enjoy each other's company before things got too serious.
Texting his ex's is not ok, neither is being cold towards you because you are having his baby and he should be supporting you. But it sounds to me like he is preparing you to break up by asking you to get a job, that shows he wants you to be able to support yourself financially so he doesnt have to do it anymore.
I think you need to confront him and tell him you are not putting up with this anymore - he cannot text his ex's, and you need to find out if he meant what he said to that particular ex when he said his heart belonged to her. If he meant that, you should leave, you deserve so much better than a man that doesnt truly love you.
Be prepared for this relationship to end though - he seems to be in love with another woman, not interested in you anymore and only staying with you for the baby and the free childcare you provide for his other child.
Good luck!
...............................
|
