A
female
age
36-40,
*hvyrdnck
writes:i was wondering if anyone could help me out. i am 3 months pregnant and my husband wont have sex with me. he has never had a problem with it with my other pregnancies. but 8 months ago i had a miscarriage and i dont know if that would be the reason he has been like this. he doesnt mind getting oral. but it never leads to sex anymore. it is making me feel unwanted. any advise would help. Reply to this Question
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female
reader, Mummy woes  +, writes (28 November 2008):
Hi, i think hes just worried incase something happens, talk to him about and and ask if hed feel beter about it as the pregnancy progresses, and until then he should be repaying the oral favour, it goes 2 ways! Good luck x
A
female
reader, thatgothgirl20 +, writes (12 September 2008):
 You have a little person in you.
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A
female
reader, OpenSecret55 +, writes (12 September 2008):
 Maybe he feels its his fault that you had that miscarriage, you should sit and talk to him about it and tell him exactly how you feel, just like you have now.
Maybe he's looking for reassurance. Whatever the reason, talk to him about it, and if it is that he feels its his fault then go to your Doctor with him and discuss the do's and don'ts, the health and saftey part of pregnancy to make you both feel confident about having sex.
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A
female
reader, lexilou +, writes (12 September 2008):
 He is scared that if he penetrates you he will hurt the baby this is a normal response to previous miscarriage for some men even though you feel he is being irrational. Maybe he hasnt come to terms with his grief as it would have been a very hard time for both of you and he is frightened of you hurting you and getting hurt himself again. Talk to him about this, maybe take him to a doctors or antenatal appointment and ask the question is it ok to have sex. Dont make it all him or say HE wont have sex!! Or look up articles on the internet and show him but do it in a gentle understanding and non-confrontational way. I think if you give him time, as the pregnancy progresses, he will come round to the idea again. Be patient and maybe try telling him you dont want to give oral at the moment as it is making you feel sick due to the pregnancy, he may start wanting sex again if this is taken away from him!! I wish you both luck x
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A
female
reader, SugarCookie +, writes (12 September 2008):
I think and i could be wrong that he is worried that he might have caused the miscarriage. Maybe he is worried to he will hit your cervic and cause you to lose the baby.
The thing is only he knows why he doesn't want sex so you have to ask him.
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