A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I just found out I am three weeks pregnant - it's not the best time for it in that Myself and my boyfriend have just moved into his parents house for the year so that he can afford to start his own business. (I have a permanent job.) And right now, he is super stressed out with the business planning. I know once he gets over this hump that things will settle down in a few weeks. Do you think I should wait until then to tell him because I know it will fuel his worries...? I don't want to lie but I don't want to add to stress . I know that after the initial shock he'll be happy.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (29 March 2014): Congratulations!! We were in a similar situation - it changes life so much, but you know what,it's so worth it. Our baby daughter is 3 months old and the whole family just adores her. She makes us laugh even on the most stressful day when we both are starting business', him working and me going to school part- time. She's part of the team now. Tell him and be positive. This is wonderful!
A
female
reader, Aunty Babbit  +, writes (29 March 2014):
 It's very early days but I think he needs to know as soon as possible.
His stress isn't going vanish overnight and there may always be another stress on the horizon that needs dealing with before it's the "perfect" time to tell him.
You're carrying his baby and have a good relationship, you need support too. The early days of pregnancy can be a worrying and emotional time, thanks to hormonal fluctuations, so he should really be on side.
God forbid something should go wrong, you will need his support and it will be so much harder to tell him then.
OK, so the timing isn't quite right, you could argue that there's never a right time to have a baby, however focusing on this might be just the diversion your boyfriend needs.
Yes, babies cost money, but you have each other and your families, I'm sure it will all work out.
I wish you well and hope this helps AB x
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (29 March 2014): You know him best, OP, so you know whether he'd want to know sooner or later.
I say just tell him today though. Can you really see the stress leaving any time soon? I mean he's only at the planning stage, the real stress happens when he starts getting the ball rolling.
If you can honestly say that there will be a point in a next few weeks where he'll not be under any stress at all then maybe you can wait, but he's starting a new business. I don't see that stress leaving any time soon. Best to just tell him sooner rather than later, OP. Having a baby is something he has to factor into any decisions he makes, any risks he takes he has to know he has another financial dependent on the way.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (29 March 2014): I think that you know him best and if you feel that it's best to tell him when he settles down, then that's your choice. You could start dropping hints every couple of days though, see how he reacts to it to give you and idea of when the right time to tell him would be - he may even figure it out for himself.
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