A
female
 ,
anonymous
writes:i have wanted a baby now for about 3 years and whilst going out with my boyfriend we had been trying for one however i just couldnt get pregnant. I was so into the idea for having a baby because now i feel that i am ready, even though im only 19. I have my own house, have a good job and i know that i can provide well for a child. Its not just some teenage thing either, i thought that i would get over it but now i feel it getting stronger and stronger. I feel jealous of the fact that my friend, who has never wanted kids, has ended up pregnant and she really does not want this child however is going to have it anyway. I feel totally let down now because i have been trying to get pregnant for ages now and there she goes and gets pregnant not even meaning to. Now that i aint with my boyfriend i still feel the need for a baby. I want to become a mum so badly, i know that i could cope. I practically helped bring up my niece who is now 4 and i loved every minute of it, fair enough there was times when i could have pulled my hair out but having a baby is such a wonderful experience, so ive heard and i really wanna experience it, right now. Am i wise??
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female
reader, uonlyliveonce +, writes (18 August 2006):
 whats your relationship like with your boyfriend does he want a baby as much as you do?
i'll not patronise you by saying your too young because your not. i had a baby at 17 and although i didnt mean to get pregnant it was the best thing that ever happened to me. thats mainly because before i was totally going the wrong way and drinking and doing drugs a lot of the time second i knew i was pregnant i changed all that and i dont miss it on bit. i was lucky because i had money for a house and to support a baby and i also had support of my family my boyfriend and my friends.
if its definitly what you want and your boyfriends going to stop by you no matter what then as long as you can support your baby its your choice. it will change your life and you say you want to 'experience'it just remember this experience is for life and you cant just change your mind if you decide you dont like it. make sure you've had all your fun living up your teen years first coz a baby takes up all your time. i dont regret it because id had enough of going out clubbing and drinking and stuff like that by the time i was pregnant and if i ever want a night out now i can still afford it.
think it through you've got forever to get pregnant and when its supposed to happen it will. x x x
A
female
reader, seenitdoneit +, writes (17 August 2006):
It is easy to get so wrapped up in one idea that the rest of the world passes you by. At 19 there is plenty of time. You can give more to a child if you truly know yourself and this will come with time. Becoming stressed out about not getting pregnant can prevent pregnancy, so if you see the baby-making bit as only part of your life, you may relax enough to get pregnant.
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A
female
reader, bonym +, writes (17 August 2006):
 My dear, perhaps the reason you have been unable to get pregnant at this time is because you are not ready to be a mum yet, yes I know you really want a child and you seem like such a caring, sweet, intelligent, level headed person from what you have written, but nothing happens before its time. I know you have everything you need for the baby etc, but as I said, things happen in their own time. I understand about your friend, I love kids to bits, I adore them, yet I know several girls who thought about aborting their babies and some who seem to not want their own kids yet at 23 I dont even have one child and absolutely adore them. My dear you are still young so there is plenty of time and when you do get pregnant be the best mum you can be. Take care and dont worry. xXx
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