A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:HiI used to date a guy briefly years ago and he had alot of baggage I wasn't ready to deal with so I ended things quickly. Recently, he contacted me we have been texting again. He told me he had big feelings for me before and was hurt I ended things. Anyways, he mentioned he just got out of a toxic relationship. He still loves her and is looking for a distraction in his words to get over her. I'm not interested in being someones rebound I did tell him this. He said he would like to eventually get into a relationship. This sounds too deep for me. A man just getting out of a relationship still in love and wanting me to be a distraction to get over her. What kind of person even asks these things?
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male
reader, kenny +, writes (7 September 2021):
 I think that you did the right thing ending things with him when you did.
He say's he needs a distraction to get over a toxic relationship, i would not let this distraction be you if i was you.
When a relationship ends we needs to give ourselves time to heal, time to get over it on our own and in our own time. We should only enter into a new relationship when we are completely over the last one.
He was wrong contacting you and telling you this. I think that you should wish him well and tell him your not interested, then block him and move on.
A
female
reader, Honeypie  +, writes (4 September 2021):
 You ask:
"What kind of person even asks these things?"
I'd guess, someone who is afraid of being on his own. Someone who wants constant support. Plenty of people jump from person to person out of some scarcity notion. That is, if they don't have a partner they are unloveable.
Wish him well and block him.
You made the RIGHT move the FIRST time you decided he had too much baggage.
He wasn't right for you then, he isn't right for you now.
He doesn't WANT a Mrs. Right - he wants a Ms. Rightnow.
You would be a consolation counselor. Someone to listen to his story of "woe is me". Once he is better, he would dump you for someone new who hadn't seen him when he just got dumped.
If he needs therapy he should find a therapist, not dig through his "little black book" and call up exes to "entertain and distract" him. Jeez...
I'd block the moron.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (4 September 2021): A very entitled one.He sure has got some nerve in asking you to be his distraction to get over another woman.Then again, at least he was sincere and did not beat around the bush about his intentions which seem to be totally self-serving and recreational. You told him already that you are not interested, I think you can leader it at that, no further contacts will be necessary.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (4 September 2021): He sounds like a loser. You made the right choice to let him go previously
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