A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:hello. there's this boy at my school. we went out a couple years back but it wasn't anything serious, i mean we were like 11-12? so yeah. but this year i started to like him so much. and he talked to me first. so we've been talking since and he's told me that he likes me a lot. but where do we go from there? i kinda want him to ask me out but i don't know. so what should i do to take it to the next level? i'm not going to ask him out. i like the boy asking me. Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (13 September 2008): Ok this seems really simple, you problem only lies with the label. Stop obsessing over 'going out' if you guys are having fun, communicating well and not hurting anyone else that life is good! Who cares what labels society uses, they are only conventions used to put people into boxes. If you must have a label, think of yourselves as courting, it's much more romantic, don't you think? Sure Facebook and Bebo etc. don't have 'courting' or 'good friends that like to hold hands' or whatever you are as a category, but surely life is more interesting without so many boxes to fit into.
If you are worried about him seeing other people then tell him that. Don't ask him out, just tell him how you feel, that you like him and that you don't want to see him with anyone else.
Finally ask yourself, "what is really wrong with me asking him out?" Didn't he ask you out last time, I think it's fair for you to ask him out. Relationships aren't about romance, they are about communication and connection, so if you need to be 'going-out' with him make one small sacrifice and ask him out. You never no, maybe he's the kind of guy who would like to be asked out. Feminism has been one of the most powerful movements in history, take this as an opportunity to challenge gender stereotypes, be a bit more assertive, get what you want. It won't make you less of a woman, it will make you a more complete, balanced woman.
Best wishes
22-M
P.S. follow your intuition
P.P.S. if things get serious physically educate yourself and be safe!
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