A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:So I'm not sure if this is a question as much as me just wanting to get it out, but here's my situation. I'm 9 years older then a girl I've meet recently. I know her family well, her parents, little sister, and little brother I see as my own family. We flirt and talk a lot. I just recently moved from one side of the country to the other and am away from my family, but this family has filled that void very well. The girl is still young and needing to mature, I understand this. I'm at a point in my life that I am no longer looking for just a relationship but more then that. When I first saw this girl I thought she was closer to the age of 18 and so does anyone else who knows of her but not her age. She is very mature even though I see that she needs to mature more. I'm a virgin and live my life for god. She is the most beautiful girl I've ever seen and is so mature for her age I know she will only have more and more going for her as she gets older. I guess my question is would it be wise to keep talking and getting to know her? Would it be to much of a risk to wait so long for a girl I don't even know would like me in the future? I'm not closing my mind from perusing girls more my age and in my situation, but I can see many things that are in tune with what I will be looking for in a relationship in her. Here are some things I'm afraid of:1. Her parents might become upset because I spent a lot of time with them. I wouldn't want her parents to become upset with me thinking I only spent time around them so much because of there underage daughter as that is not the case.2. I'm completely wasting my time and may in the future fall in love with a girl who does not think of me this away.3. I don't want to alienate her brother and sister and make things weird for her whole family. What would you all say is the best way to go about this. I'm sure many might say just forget about it and move on but I don't see it being that easy. Hopefully this made since and wasn't to long of a read...
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female
reader, laura_pops_87  +, writes (4 August 2009):
I think you should go for it...You only ever life once and so what shes 9 yrs youngeryour a good bible boy her parents will love you. I am sure.I am in a similar situation with a guy 9 yrs older than me, we grew up together and like each other but because, of the situation. The same as yours. He wont go for it. I think thats wrong. You should make yourself happy and let things fall into place.goodluck x
A
reader, anonymous, writes (4 August 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks Quirklady. I honestly think I knew that but I just needed someone to tell me it. I think I will just continue to get to know her and her family as friends. Like I said I will continue to pursue women my age that are in my situation. I appreciate all comments and advice. We will see how it goes from here. I always say you can't put stipulations on love, and "waiting" in this situation would be very unwise. Who knows what will happen. Maybe we will end up together maybe not, but as Quirklady suggested I will move on and see where the cards fall.
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A
female
reader, QuirkLady +, writes (2 August 2009):
 Umm, you listed your age as 22-25 which means this girl can't be older than 16 and she hasn't even said she likes you. Why pin all your hopes on a young girl who may not even be interested in you? Like you said, there are other girls out there with families that you don't see as your own. Move on and date other people. If she's meant to be in your life, she'll come into it later.
Good luck.
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reader, anonymous, writes (1 August 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI understand and appreciate what you are saying rifraf. I should have done maybe a better job of explaining it. But I definantly appreciate any and all advice.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (1 August 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionWell Timbo I don't agree that she will be a completely different person, and calling her a "little girl" would offend her because she isn't. I understand what you are saying however, but think maybe its different then you have perceived it to be. I'm not "thinking" anything wrong or bad. I know her parents and they have an age gap between them as well. I think this is a pretty odd coincidence but my parents are 9 years apart also. I understand what you all are saying though and appreciate the comments.
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A
male
reader, timbo +, writes (1 August 2009):
If she's as young as you make it sound, even thinking this way is wrong in so many ways. When she does mature she will be a different person than you now know. Her folks would freak out if they knew the truth. Put yourself in their shoes. You are being selfish and have poor judgement, although writing here is a good sign. Leave the little girl alone and look elsewhere for fulfillment.
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