A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes: I got married 7 years ago and moved to the US. I have some friends back home, male and female, form my university days. I am still in contact with some of them. With my male friends I talke by phone just Couple of times per year. One of my friends is moving to Canada and he contacted me and told me that he may come to the US to visit me. I am so happy even though we really were not close friends but still it brings back lots of memories from those days. He is absolutely amazing gentleman; by the way he is younger than me. The question is if he comes here do you think it is appropriate that I invite him to stay in my house? I have a pretty big house, 5 bedrooms and just me my hubby and my 4 years old child lives here. It is not unusual in my country that if someone comes to visit you stay in your place, I can say everybody does that. But for me this is the first time and I don’t know even how my husband will react if I ask him. What do you think? Thanks for your help
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male
reader, C. Grant +, writes (31 May 2011):
Absolutely no reason not approach your husband about this. It sounds perfectly innocent on your part, and it's not at all unusual to offer friends and acquaintances a place to stay, particularly if you have lots of room. Of course if your husband has a problem then it's not on, but by all means ask.
A
female
reader, k_c100 +, writes (31 May 2011):
Well if he is coming to stay when your husband is in the house, and is obviously staying in a seperate bedroom - then I cant see a problem!
I guess it just depends on your relationship with your husband and what type of man he is. Is he jealous? Does he know about this friend? Has he ever spoke to your friend before? Is this friend purely a friend, or has it ever been more than that (did you ever get close to him at college or anything like that)? Have you ever had any issues with trust/cheating/jealousy etc in the past? Does he have a problem with you having opposite sex friends? Or does he have a few female friends too?
If you and your husband have a good relationship and neither of you are particularly jealous about the other's friends, and you ask him before you say anything to your friend - then I think everything should be fine. There is no harm in asking him, the worst he can do is say no and your friend will have to stay in a hotel. It shouldnt be a big issue, but without knowing your husband or the relationship it is hard to say how he will react!
But in terms of is it ok to have a male friend to stay at your house - then I would say yes. But everyone will have a different opinion, and the only opinion that matters here is your husband's.
I hope this helps and good luck!
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