A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:i'm a 31 year old married woman. my husband and i have been married for six years, and we have no children. i have been friends with a man for half of my life, and i've known him WAY longer than my husband. this friend and i have been exchanging emails and phone calls lately, and he has told me that he loved me and wants me to leave my husband for him, but he is married. this is his second marriage, and i don't think he is going to leave his wife, because they just got married. he professes his love to me every day, and tells me he needs me and we should still be lovers and i love him so much, more than i love my husband. what do i do? how do i let this friend go and move on, when i've known him for so long, and it's hard to just let him go. what do you guys think i should do? i've tried to go the high road and tell him that we have been friends for too long, and i don't want to mess up our relationship, and i'm married, but he doesn't care and still tells me almost everyday that he loves me and we should be lovers...HELP ME!!!
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male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (10 May 2010):
He doesn't love you. As I man, I can show you right now he doesn't.
1 - He has been married twice already. He is divorced once, and is already having troubles in his next marriage to the point where he is considering and affair. That shows how badly he thinks of women, that he doesn't fox the problem.
2 - If he does love you that much, he will divorce his wife right now, move out, and give you time to think about it. He won't do that and you know it. All he is offering is 'lovers',
3 - He knows you are married, and is trying to use your unhappiness to tear you away from your husband.
So you have a choice. You can either have the affair and blow two marriages apart knowing that he will never commit and will cheat on you. Or you can give him up and cut him out permanently and focus on your marriage. You can't have both. Don't just have an affair, because if you do not only will you end up used and abused, you will lose your husband and you will come off far worse. It's a known fact that a woman having an affair with a married man comes off worse. You will be the biggest loser of all, and you will lose the lot. It recently happened to a woman near us. She was married, and had an affair. Her married lover them dumped her, and her own husband found out. Now she has nothing and her ex husband is having a field day telling everyone she had an affair. Her reputation has been left in tatters.
The point is, you will lose. So if you don't love your husband, leave him. But don't open yourself up that your reputation will be left in a mess.
A
male
reader, viewsonic +, writes (10 May 2010):
so you want a man that will cheat on his wife ( sorry if you have known him for long but that will go out the window if 1 thing goes wrong )
and should he want a wife that will cheat on her man .
it might take a while but these questions will come up
you know what to do but are asking
just because something is hard dose not mean we should do it. if the other man can not respect your holy bonds then he dose not understand the true meaning of love and if i were you , stay far from him . now that is while you are married . if you don't want your husband than half a talk and don't hurt him any longer . think about it
glad there is no kids to get hurt thoe . good luck
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