A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:I am having an affair with a married man who I work with. I am also married and whilst I love my husband, I'm not attracted to him and our sex life is pretty non-existent and dull. Recently, a very attractive man at work started taking an interest in me and asked me out for a lunchtime drink. He was clearly flirting with me and after about a month we ended up in bed. He's a fantastic and considerate lover and I love the time we spend together (just the odd lunchtime). He has two children and although he says he wished we'd met before we married, I know we'll never be together. I am only the third person he's slept with and he says it's a measure of how he feels about me. We've tried to stop on 3 occassions now as the guilt became unbearable, but we can't seem to keep our hands off eachother. He's now going cold on me and I'm starting to feel used. I know I should stop seeing him as I don't want to hurt anyone, but I just feel sick inside knowing I have to see him at work every day and I can't be with him
View related questions:
affair, at work, flirt, I work with, married man, sex life Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (2 September 2007): What did you expect? If I cheated everytime I got bored with my husband I would be the biggest whore on this earth. You have to communicate with your husband and make a decision as to what you want. Obviously you are not capable of making rational decisions right now so YOU need to take some time and figure out why this happened. Cheating is bad and nothing good ever comes out of it but why would you choose someone that you work with? Most of the time it is just a conquer and quest thing for men who are married. You were his prey and guess what, he doesn't give a damn about you, only what he got from. He's now moved on to the next victim. Don't allow yourself to contiune to be his victim. Not to mention the people that you are victimizing ie...your husband, his wife and kids. Get it together or get a divorce and reevaluate your morals.
A
female
reader, LauraE +, writes (24 July 2007):
If you can’t face him at work, then look for a new job. If you work for a big company, move departments. If not, move to a new company. This is almost always possible – what would you do if you had been made redundant? If it is impossible, then you just have to face him and look like you don’t care. By the way, I doubt that you really are the only 3rd person he has slept with. It sounds like just the sort of line the office Romeo comes out with in order to flatter a woman into bed and keep her there. He has gone cold because he is bored with you and is looking for the next “3rd woman he has ever slept with”. Maybe your husband is also bored and isn’t saying anything. This should be your main concern. You should talk to him about the problems in your marriage and work on them. If you end up losing him as well, you may find that he wasn’t so unattractive after all – too late.
...............................
A
male
reader, leonard j.Douglas  +, writes (24 July 2007):
It looks like two married people are into not only social, but also religious, NO NO'S. I'm not about to castigate ether of you. There was once a time when I would of jumped on the Bandwagon of condemnation, but then this man said, " If any man be guiltless let him cast the first stone". Adultry in ones heart, isn't any different than in the doing. I'm not saying that what you two did or still may be doing is right, Becase God says it is sin. Yes all of us sometime, or other, in our lives have been guilty of mind adultry. Your Husband isn't great in bed, but life isn't just centered around the bedroom and sex. You both need to end the relationship,as it is mentally, physically and religiously unhealthy, and your guilt is telling you both that it is time to end a sick relationship. And there are other's who will get hurt if the both of you DO NOT END IT NOW.
...............................
A
female
reader, eyeswideopen  +, writes (23 July 2007):
 Awww poor you. You reap what you sow. Lots of bad decisions here, decided to cheat on your husband, decided to cheat with a coworker, decided to try to behave like responsible adults but decided to go back to the vomit. NOW you expect sympathy because he's gone onto greener pastures and you will see him at work but can't have him. And you have the audacity to feel sorry for yourself, not your husband, not the creep's poor wife and kids, but yourself. You give women a bad name.
...............................
|
