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male
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anonymous
writes: About 4 years ago When I was 10 I had a sexual encounter with my friend (He was a guy) All I did was touch his penis. But now I regret It but can't help eating myself up inside about it and wondering why I did it. I Had girlfriends in the past and Have a crush on this one girl At this time But I Can't help wonder why I did it. I'm so confused, I don't look at guys like "Oh he's Hot". But I'm not afraid to admitt if a guy is good looking. You know? I don't see guys in that way. I just can't help think that I'm gay because i did that. I don't even remember why i did it, He kept pressuring me and i finally did. I just need some advice.
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female
reader, Bev Conolly  +, writes (19 July 2006):
 Can I just say one thing first? Don't worry yourself!
Kids often explore each other's bodies, and that sometimes includes sexually. It's not a glimpse into your future and being curious about another kid's penis doesn't cement you into a gay lifestyle. Girls and boys have had your same experience with each other throughout history. It's more a learning experience than a sexual one... though there does always seem to be one boy who wants to "go first"! It sounds like your 9-year-old playfriend was that boy.
You haven't said so, but it's plain you're frightened this means you're gay. But you're not gay unless and until you find yourself more attracted to men than you are to women. And admitting that a person is attractive isn't the same thing as being attracted to them, so put your mind at ease about your sexuality for now.
The reason that you get "slightly aroused" when you think back on the experience is likely that it's because it's the only sexual experience you've had to date. It's the only thing you've done, so it tends to be the experience you hang your sexual connects on. But later, when you've had sexual touch from a girl or a woman, you might find that the arousal from this memory drops off.
If, after you've had the same sexual contact with a few girls or women, you find yourself yearning for the thrill of a boy touching you, then you're leaning in a gay direction. But unless that happens, you're very likely straight.
Please don't worry. What you experienced was just a child's exploration of human design and really very ordinary.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (19 July 2006): just to add he was 9 or so. He wasn't an adult. And This was my only sexual encounter so far. And I don't know why but sometimes I do get slightly aroused at the thought.
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