A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Im 20 years old and I'm starting to lose intrest in my boyfriend of 2 years / 4 months. What can I do to try and get back "into him"? He is in college so we cant really go out because he's away. This is his second year of college and the first year he left I didnt feel this way. I feel uninterested in being emotional with him lately. Is there anything i can do to change that? Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, HereAreMyTwoCents +, writes (14 October 2009):
 First I want to refer you to an answer I gave a previous question:
http://www.dearcupid.org/question/im-getting-bored-with-my-girlfriend--does.html
In your case, though, it is a long distance relationship at the moment, so you need to find creative ways to stay closely in touch. Personally, I have always thought that a long distance relationship is an oxymoron, which means in practical terms that if you want it to work, you have to work EXTRA hard, and be EXTRA creative. Barring any other issues that you may have not told us about, I am assuming that everything between you two is peachy keen aside from your loss of interest. So start paying extra attention to him in new and creative ways. For example, go above and beyond, to see each other more often. If you really love someone, you will do that, and they will see it. Hypothetical example: Are you a plane ride away? Have you been spending your extra money on getting your nails done? Stop the nail salon visits when he's not there to see your beautiful nails anyway? (yes, I am female myself and I do understand that fashion is also about keeping up with the other girls, but here is where you would put romance above that) Save you nail salon money and buy a plane ticket for a weekend visit every month. Also, do you have anything that is specifically keeping you from moving to be with him and live together near his college, such as having to go to another college because it carries a major you are deeply interested in pursuing? If it's just a job that's keeping you away, and unless you're in heavy duty debt (which hopefully at your age you have not had this misfortune yet) well, that's nothing. People get jobs and quit jobs all the time. Make sure you have enough money to cover you until you can find another job near him. It all comes down to priorities. How important is this relationship to you, and what are you willing to give up for it? Good luck. Think hard. And decide well.
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