A
female
age
,
anonymous
writes:My relationship with my youngest child's father has been on the rocks for some years and I kept trying. Xmas I made it clear I was not happy and now what to move on. I have not allowed him to use me sexually for months.(does not take me out, does not talk about future, never met his family etc etc).I am so disappointed as I really thought he was the one. I have two kids for a previous relationship and had my last just before I turned 40. I do not want any more children.I met a great guy at my previous work place and mutual attraction developed and I could not stop thinking about him. It made me realise the sort of man I really need in my life now. I could not progress in that friendship as he was living with someone.I currently work as cabin crew for a major airline and I meet men all the time but I am not with them long enough to get to know them. I have made the decision to join a professional matching agency that is going to cost me hundreds of pounds. I have already been to a number of their socials but do not meet the right kind of people there.I am really nervous as I am very independent with my own properties, car, houses etc. I am not looking for someone for their money but more for companionship and friendship and I would like to be someones wife and be able to call someone my husband.I was wondering if you could give me some words of advice and encouragement. I really was attracted to the guy I worked with but I feel if he really wanted to find out more about me, he would have done so by now.thank you for your time.
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female
reader, Honeypie  +, writes (9 January 2012):
 Never settle.
When you go out on the dates:
- don't talk "I want to get married-talk" right of the bat.
- don't talk about the ex's in ad nauseum, they really don't want to know, they want to know you.
- don't get drunk.
- don't have sex on the first date, you can go to the pub and pick up a guy if that is what you want.
- take you time to get to know the guy. If you aren't sure after the first 3-4 dates, he isn't the one.
- don't be afraid if you have to meet more then 1 guy to find a good match.
(I think you are smart by not trying to pursue the guy at work, I think you got it right, that if he was interested, he would have made an effort - remember that when you go out of dates - if he doesn't make an effort to talk to you after a date... assume he isn't interested.)
Be prepared to kiss a few frogs.
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