A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:So, I have this friend, and basically I'm really jealous of her. She's drop dead gorgeous. She's a model, and it seems like she gets everything she wants. On top of that, she's probably the sweetest, funniest, most caring person anyone has ever met.Every single boyfriend she has lasts longer that 6 months, and all the guys she dates are attractive, and she has them wrapped around her finger. People always talk about how pretty great she is, and she has a line-up of guys waiting to date her.The problem? THIS PISSES ME OFF. Its not fair, I don't understand why she gets the perfect boyfriends, the looks, the happy life, everything. I want to be her friend because she's fun to be around, but I can't stop feeling anger and meanness towards her. Whenever I'm around her, this bugs me. I don't want to stop being her friend, but I really need help with getting angry and I need help to stop being jealous of her. Please, any suggestions?
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male
reader, Serpico  +, writes (11 June 2012):
I said this in another thread, but it bears repeating here.
I have a niece who at age 17 needed to have her left leg amputated a the knee because of an operation she needed to save her life.
How "jealous" do you think she'd be of your ability to walk without a mechanical device to help her?
Be thankful for what God gave you, and make the best of it. There will be always someone who you perceive will have more, and someone who has less. It makes no difference in the end.
A
male
reader, grymsoul +, writes (8 June 2012):
 Hahah, welcome to the story of my life. My friend is exactly the same as yours. He gets all the girls that turns me down. He even gets them to post half nude pics of themselves and send it to him. I couldn't even get them to stop for a conversation. I know how tough it is to be friends with a person that lives the life YOU WANT. You get to witness it everytime you're with them. You get to see him/her hit on every guy/girl you like AND watch them succeed. Even worse, you see the person you have a crush on approach your friend for his/her number. EVEN WORSE, you get to see half naked photos of your crush in his/her phone, knowing that he/she was sucessful in getting something that you never will.Yea, I know the feeling alright. But you know what. He's a great friend. We go out together. We laugh together. We're even doing a music video together. We're great friends. He can't help it that so many girls are into him. He can't help it that he's a better catch than I am. I've learned to accept the fact that He'll be better at some things than I am. But I also accept the fact that I WORK HARDER than he does. You know, hard work vs. natural talent. He's natural talent, I'm a hard worker. When his looks wear off then he'll be too lazy to work for the prize. I'm always struggling to get it so it's kinda natural for me to work harder for it than he will. Therefore, I appreciate it more when I do get it. A quality I think a lot of women seem to forget. I know it must hurt you deeply to watch your friend get the guys, the life, the looks, everything that you want. But really, if you were her, you might not thing so highly of her anymore. Why? Well, you say she happens to keep boyfriends longer than six months. This tells me that she has yet to find the right guy for her so it's quite a headache to constantly switch up boyfriends. You also say that guys are lined up to date her. Well think of how this would feel to her current boyfriend. He will ALWAYS be insecure and possesive of her to show that he's the only one. Those aren't attractive qualities, which explains why she doesn't keep them for long. Six months isn't long for a relationship. My longest one was 5 years. My shortest was 3. Stop thinking too much about her life and try to improve yours. Your problem is that you are standing in her shadow. You're dreaming of getting the things she has but you aren't ACTING on it. STOP comparing your life to yours. START apprreciating yours for what you do have. I know it's harder to do than it sounds but you have to try.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (8 June 2012): You have qualities that she hasn't and we each get something good in our lives. Just because she meets a lot of guys doesn't mean she will find the right one.
When you scratch below the surface, some people's lives aren't as good as we might imagine. There might be something you have that she is jealous of too.
It's a waste of time envying someone else. Just make the most of what you have and try not to compare yourself.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (8 June 2012): HiLifes like that, some people get it all, but I bet she doesn't see it like that. The thing is she is a lovely person so that makes it harder to cope with what you see as the perfect girl with everything going for her.Am sure everyone knows a girl/woman like that, and men know men too. Jealousy isnt a good emotion,nobody likes it. All you can do is try to focus more on yourself and your life. Everyone has a talent and your probably just as attractive in your own way. Stop comparing yourself to her, look at all your other friends,spend time with them, she's just one person.As for her boyfriends, they don't last,she isnt engaged, she isnt taking them seriously, nor has she found love. Shes just enjoying being young.So should you.
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