| A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: Dear readers,I was dating but decided to take a break and be single. My best friend has been single longer than me and recently got a new boyfriend. I am honestly feeling somewhat jealous! I thought we were going to be single together and it made me feel comforted knowing I wasn’t single on my own. I know part of it is silly and selfish especially because I would also tell my friend about dates and people and she was always supportive while not dating anyone and I never thought how it could have made her fee! I am also blind sided as I expected her to be single for awhile longer just because she’s so busy with work etc. I am also jealous because she is now spending time with him and lately I feel that is time that I want her to spend with me! Lately she’s so busy and I’m not really a priority. We don’t have set plans to hang out and sometimes it is like she almost has an excuse. I briefly sent her a text explaining somewhat how I feel because now she’s so busy I hardly see her in person and she hasn’t respond. I was expecting her to say something maybe apologizing or offering something supportive. Am I crazy for being jealous? Why didn’t she respond-did I say something wrong to freak her out?
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female
reader, TasteofIndia  +, writes (23 June 2023):
 Okay, I whole heartedly agree with Honeypie.
You are definitely, 100% out of line here. You're jealous, okay. That's understandable. I do see that you are aware that this is silly and selfish. It's okay to have the feelings, but it is not cool to actively punish her because she decided to start dating? It's not YOUR LIFE. She found someone, she is happy - yes, its' always annoying at the beginning of a relationship because they're all excited and tied up with each other. But, really? You want her to APOLOGIZE to you?
Goodness, you are probably not a terrible person, but you ARE being a terrible friend right now. Especially as you note that at one point you decided to get back out there and she was supportive. So it's cool for you to try, but she isn't allowed to? You just... want her to be lonely? You're so young, you're asking her to commit to another 50-60 years of being single simply because you don't want to be single by yourself? Yes, girl - this is super selfish of you.
Unless you can both enthusiastically commit to an asexual relationship or domestic partnership to each other, she owes you absolutely ZERO control over her life and decisions.
Be better, queen. You can be better. I think the first step is an earnest apology from you. And to learn that friendship goes both ways.
A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (21 June 2023):
 "Am I crazy for being jealous? "
In short, YES.
BE happy that she has found someone who has the potential for being her LIFE mate!
"I thought we were going to be single together and it made me feel comforted knowing I wasn’t single on my own. "
Misery loves company...
YOU made the choice to be single. SHE didn't . She decided to move on with her life.
You are in your 30's and I bet so is she. So maybe it's high time to FIND that someone that you could potentially spend the rest of your life with (or a good portion of it).
You need to chill and grow up.
HER life doesn't revolve around you. Only YOUR world does.
Find yourself a hobby. Be happy for your friend.
It is ABSOLUTELY normal that people who start dating will spend MORE time with their new partner than with friends. Especially, if she senses you are jealous.
You write...
"I was expecting her to say something maybe apologizing or offering something supportive"
WHY?
What is she supposed to apologize for?
"I'm sorry I met a great guy and I hope he is the one for me?"
You said you CHOSE to be single, so why do you need "support"? For what?
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