A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Question.. How do you get over someone? This is someone I could only be 'friends' with due to that individual's circumstances, however now he's moved on and we don't have contact and never see eachother out or anything. At the time I really liked him, but now he's gone and I no longer see him it's almost unbearable, it's like my thoughts and feelings for him have trebled. (Plus I can't resist looking at Facebook but his profile pic he's with another girl, same on her profile!) I'm insanely jealous and annoyed.This is making it hard for me to move on cos I feel like I can't, and no guys I've met these past 6 months do anything for me. Even though things got complicated it still felt like we had a connection / it was fate or something! this is something I've never experienced before
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female
reader, O Connor +, writes (6 March 2008):
 hey hun - well i agree with the last post, i think the reason why you are still having these feelings for him is becuase you never got any real closure or reaction from him, and so there is probably the slight hope left that he will come around. but im afraid to say if he is with someone else now, then it will probably always be friendship. i know its hard to want someone when they dont want you back, but thats just sometimes the cruel reality of things. to get over him you will just need time to heal, and you can also do other things to help you stop thinking about him. first of all, you have to STOP looking at his facebook - it is only causing more pain, and you dont want that so why keep going back? it just reminds you of what cant be. second of all - spend time with your friends, get out and enjoy the ppl in your life, be active and maybe even take up a new hobby. and while it seems impossible right now, go out and meet new guys - think of the characteristics of this guy and look for them in other guys! after all - there are plenty of fish in the sea you know!! dont worry hunny, you will get over him - you just need to feel it first, hope this helps, email me if you want xxx
A
male
reader, Dazzerg  +, writes (6 March 2008):
 You have to recognise that part of the reason that you got over this is that you never really had a chance to try if that makes sense so the feelings you had are unresolved and have no closure. I dont know what prevented him being with you but sadly it is sometimes the case that things dont work out due to circumstances we can't directly control. There are a number of things you can do;
- try and keep active and go out with friends, keep your mind busy and it has less time to dwell on what might have been, go out with friends, do things you want to do that keep you occupied etc.
- DONT look at his profile which is just a way of torturing yourself. You might even want to take him off your Facebook if you are not still friends.
- get back on the scene, look for the qualities that made you feel so attracted to him in other guys and you will soon find yourself finding other people attractive.
Hope that helps. Good luck :)
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