A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I have this guy I fell in love with right from the first day I met him. We live in different cities but we talk, even though it's not as often as I want. Nor what am used to. I just take it like that because I think he's the ideal man I want to take home to my dad. The first time he invited to visit him, he bought my ticket and I went. When I was there he told me he had a girlfriend, and I said ok. And I walked away. In between he kept trying to reach me. But I kept pushing him away. So one day he was in my city and he invited me out. We hung out and I had fun, because even though we were in public his hands were all over me. When I was about to leave he kissed me really affectionately.Before I got home he had called and started asking me to, 'let's work things out.' And I said I didn't want what happened to happen again. He said, 'it wouldn't, and that I should forget about it.'The next weekend he invited me over..Ever since it has been one thing or the other. I know he's not a very expressive person with words, but I want him to love me. Its been over 9months since I met him.I still don't understand why he never told me about he's girlfriend all the while we used to chat and talk on the phone. He had to wait for me to come to visit before he told me.. He came into my city this holiday period, asked to see me but I told him I was weak, that he should give me time, by the time I was ready, he said he was doing something for his mum. Eventually he went back to his city without seeing me. And then asked me to come over, but I refused because I felt I wasn't important enough, he could have made a little time out of those 3days to see me. So after everything I deleted him from my messenger and every reminder about him. He didn't call me until a week later,he sent a request on my blackberry but I declined. Since then he hasn't made any form of contact. The truth is I really love him, I miss him. But am not sure he loved me. Or misses me. I feel really hurt, but I am never going to call him again. What do you think?
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reader, anonymous, writes (17 January 2011): You made the right decision, please stick with that. This guy is not good for you and if he doesn't love you enough after 9 months then he never will.
You're an intelligent woman for breaking off contact and while I know it's hard, you know in your heart it is the right thing to do to protect yourself and to get over him.
Stay away from him and move on, you will find love again and hopefully the next guy will be a good one.
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