A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I am 21 years old and I weigh about 350 pounds. My penis is only about 5 inches long and 1.75 inches wide. I am very hesitant on dating because I am afraid that girls are shallow about my weight, or the fact that my penis is too small. This in turn kills my confidence. Can anyone help me?
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reader, anonymous, writes (15 June 2011): Treat the two issues separately. I say "issues", because they are not problems. You will find women who accept your weight, but I agree with others that you should get to a doctor and get on a plan of exercise and eating right. Sometimes, these problems are hugely hormonal, and a bit of testosterone adjustment can do wonders for your body, energy, libido and a host of other things.
As for your penis, 5 inches and 1.75 across is not small. It is average. Maybe a tad on the low end of average, but average. Small is like 4" I think. If you lose some weight, it will appear larger, as the "fat pad" on your pubic bone will melt away. trimming your pubic hair will also make it appear a bit larger. If a woman is accepting of your body weight, chances are she is not so shallow that 5" will dissappoint her.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (15 June 2011): Yes, I like another aunty mentioned you should go to doctor to get a base-line on your health. That is crucial. You want to see how your heart functioning is and what amount of weight you want to loose initially to help build self-confidence. And avoid the superficial gals who are not interested working with you.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (15 June 2011): Women are most attracted to men who exude confidence whatever their body type... that's harder when you are younger and everything is so superficial. Confidence is something must work on that first within yourself. You can do it! And don't so much do the 'dating' thing as like the bar scenes and what not. Those places are all about body perfection. I prefer to date from the perspective of things I do socially otherwise.
I am a plus size (not fat woman) and I am dating an overweight man with a penis on the small side. He is over 300 lbs though more so big and tall more than fat, but he has a huge santa-clause stomach and I there was a time when I said I would not date a man with a large stomach but my maturity and his confidence and personality won me over! We have great chemistry crucial to the long haul of a good relationship...
He knows he is obese and has lost some weight for health concerns and I support that, but he'll always be a fairly big man and for the most part he's very comfortable in his skin and his sexuality. And that's what we must aim for. Yes, loosing weight is a positive, for your health anyway but it takes time. And most of us who are large and thick in build will never be thin so avoid people who are zero tolerant to any level of weight. That's time wasting.
The right women for you will look at the whole man. Not just body. Make sure you are as well groomed as possible. Some thinner men miss this crucial factor! And do not press yourself upon a woman who gives you the instant, unrelenting "NO" vibe. Move on. You will find a gal who is interested, and shower her with interest! That goes a long way towards winning a woman's mind and heart!
I adore my mans face, kiss and his touch and love how he looks at me... We joke that we are loving 'walruses' to some extent. LOL! That kind of comfort is out there, and you'll find it more as you get older. We may not be body-beautiful ala the 'standard' (I have very small breasts), but we are good for each other.
Avoid the body-perfect types as that is just too much of a uphill battle that will wear you down.
Find someone who is willing to be with you for you and work with you towards goals.
Regarding penis size. Yes, my man is small there too! But we manage, big stomach, small penis and all. Again it is confidence that helps and being with the right person. A woman who strictly prefers a larger penis is not going to be with a smaller man... That's like the man who likes large breast dogging out his woman for having small breasts. Move on! Or better don't get started.
For someone where a smaller penis size is workable there are tons of ways to work around that with the right woman. There's extended foreplay (a grand idea whatever your size - penis or body), oral sex and just cuddling and lots of affection to the right woman receptive and reciprocating.
Initially, my man and I could not really have much 'penetration' due to weight (I'm not a thin woman myself) and his size. It took time and positioning for us to get it right. I was patient. He is sorta macho about it while I was not pressed about penetration as much and made sure not pressure him about it. We spent most of our initial first sexual encounters enjoying and sharing affection, talking with lots of mutual oral and kissing.
Rear entry works for us as well as him straddling me, not putting all of his weight on me. I've felt more 'crushed' and uncomfortable under lighter men who've been careless putting all of their weight on me! Whereas my big man knowing he is over-weight takes more care not too.
We take our time to make love as neither of us are skinny and sometimes it's hard for him to stay in me... we just fumble our way back to it and 'connect' again. LOL! We laugh a lot at ourselves, not stressing over perfect sexual events. Humor, affection, passion and interest in each others minds and how we make each other 'feel' is most important.
Look for a woman that understands that. But first first understand it on your own terms. Best to you.
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A
female
reader, Abella +, writes (15 June 2011):
 It is good that you are thinking about these issue. Some girls are shallow and your weight will turn off some. It is not fair, but that is the way things are when girls are young and impressionable.
First get yourself checked out fully by a good Doctor. Not a mean nasty Fattist one. But a kind caring genuine Doctor who will give you the support you need. Forget pills and potions. The best weight loss is real. Real commitment. Real food. and real support.
One way to ensure your confidence in you soars to new heights is to log on to www.weightwatchers.com and check out the 'only for men' programs. They are tailored to help guys and you can even try doing them on line.
I realise the issue of your penis is a worry but when you lose some of the weight it will no longer look as overwhelmed as it does now but the hills surrounding it.
And much much later on when it is safe to do so your doctor can explain how you can add 2 inches by a small operation to drop the rest of your penis that is inside hidden. That is true. So you are really closer to 7 inches.
At the moment the best thing you could do for yourself is to make that first big step towards losing 10 percent of your body weight. Don't try to do it too fast as that is not the way to do it effectively.
And drink a lot more water than you do now. It's for your health. Boring as it sounds.
Do you live with someone who enables you to eat more and exercise less. It is very hard to stand up to that pressure, hence you need some outside influence like the support you can get from weight watchers.
At the moment you may not be the right size for most treadmills. But that cannot stop you lifing small weights at home untill you graduate to bigger weights,
And even if you start walking with a friend, do start walking every day. starting with 30 minutes a day or 20 minutes at first if 30 minutes seems too much.
You do need to clear the kitchen of all your snacks, soda, chocolate and cheese. And beer if it is there as well. The empty calories in beer, chips, chocolate and the fat in cheese etc are not helping you if you have reached 350 pounds.
When you lose that first five pounds you will feel great. Traditionally men have a much higher metabolism and lose weight faster. Take it slow and steady and in a year the girls will be lining up to go out with your.
This is an almighty manly battle for you to tackle. I is a courageous step on your part, if you are ready and willing to take the first step. I wish you the very best of good wishes for your journey.
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A
male
reader, N91  +, writes (15 June 2011):
 Dude, if you feel bad about yourself, make something happen. Start hitting the gym, do some cardio, start a diet and healthy eating. I have a website that could help you out no end that I use myself for weight training. It covers everything from fat loss to workout routines and also healthy diet plans, sure it'll be hard at first so set yourself goals which will help motivate yourself.
Visit www.muscleandstrength.com and that will be about to help you out with your weight problem man, sign up to the forum and there's hundreds of users that will help you out no problems.
And 5inch is nothing to worry about, I think the average is 6 inch and I don't think mine is that size either and I've had no problems with sex lol
Besides, if you find somebody that loves you for YOU then they aren't going to be shallow enough to decline you for this size of your penis.
Good luck man
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