A
female
age
,
anonymous
writes:So - I wonder what's gonna happen next! He and I have other sex partners but we have professed our love for each other. We are both jealous because our partners aren't each other. Why is it happening this way - doesn't make any sense, does it? (We are both shy to talk together). So, my plan is to leave him a note "dump her and I'll dump him" because I can't go on like this any longer (it's been going on for 8 months now). Meanwhile, I'm avoiding him because this hurts. What do you all think he will do when he reads my note? Do you think he will dump her (signs are that he's tiring of her because it's just sex and sex without love gets boring, right?). What should I do?
View related questions:
jealous, shy Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, k_c100  +, writes (19 March 2009):
 I think maybe a note is a little childish here, why dont you just go ahead and end your relationship with your "sex partner" to show this guy you really like that you are serious about being together.
Then the ball is in his court - either he ends his relationship with his "sex partner" and you can be together, or he keeps this girl and shows you that he is not committed to being in a relationship with you.
It seems to me that by leaving a note saying "dump her and I'll dump him", this screams that you dont want to end things with your sex partner just in case your guy doesnt do the same, hence you just dont want to be alone. While this is understandable, it is also a little immature. If you love this man then leave the other guy, regardless of whether or not the man you love has left his sex partner.
That will be better than any note you can leave as it really shows that you are serious about giving things a go and that you are committed to being together as a couple. A note just says you are too scared to talk to him or too scared take the leap first and end your arrangement with this other guy.
I hope this helps and good luck!
|
