A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Hi i met a guy a work 6 years ago, for a long time we were just friends, but for alike a year we start to get alone better, we were going out everyday, i told him that i love him, he told me that he loves me but he does not want to be gay and he does not want his family to knows, we kissed, he asked me to have sex and i say not because i didnt want him to feel guilty, well now he is dating a girl and he told me that he wants to marry her, we are co-workers, i see him almost everyday, i love him and i can feel his love to me, but what can i do? should i let him go? should i fight for his love? i never love someone like him, his eyes tell me how much he loves me, but his mind does not want to be with me, what can i do?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Mistify  +, writes (15 November 2007):
 This guy you love is CLEARLY in denial, and unfortunately, there is nothing you can do but wait for him to work through it.
I'm not saying that you should wait for him, until he decides that he wants to be with you, but i'm saying that you can support him through this. Surely you must know how difficult is can be for somebody to come out of the closet.
Thing is, you have to think of yourself. He is clearly not thinking of your feelings. You need to look after yourself. You seem like such a nice guy, and good for you for not trying to force things on him. I'm sure there is a man out there who will love and appreciate you for who you are. That man will not only want to tell the world that he's gay, but he would also want to tell the world that you are his GUY...
Bottom line, you can support him through this, and be there for him when this all falls down, but you need to move on emotionally.
Good luck - thinking of you...
-M-
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