A
female
age
36-40,
*uTe WIFE
writes:Dear all,I have a major problem and I need youR advice asap! I think my husband is turning out to be very greedy like my dad .. when i was young my dad used to leave me broke...he didnt give me any money...although my dad is very rich! i was always broke and wore old stuff..I graduated and I WORKED for a few month and quit my job cuz it was bad and then got married to my 2 year bf...anyways we have been married for 3 month and im starting to feel that he is greedy although he is rich also!.......he never gives me any money.. he is a pilot in the army so he goes on missions most of the time and leaves me here without giving me any penny..Last week we went shopping and he was only shopping for himself..he didnt even stop and at a womens boutique although he knew i need to shop!..ive been throwing hints but no use..he is depending on the little amout i have saved which is only 100 dollars..He has a flight today so yesterday he asked me if i needed money and im like yes i do (because i have been paying on house supplies this whole time from my savings)...he said ok im going to leave them on the kitchen table before i leave tommorow ! and i woke up with no money on the kitchen table! when i asked him he said he forgot! What should i do ? PLEASE HELP ME .. im frustrated..im looking for a job but I HATE GREEDY PEOPLE..shall i confront him or what? PLZ HELP:(
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (3 August 2008): It takes 2 to make a partnership...you say you worked, but quit your job "cuz it was bad". What exactly does that mean, and why did you not find another job? You don't mention children, so I assume you do not have any.
Perhaps you just want to be a woman kept in fine things by her husband? The fact that you indicate you are "CuTe WIFE" makes me wonder if you view yourself as a pretty bauble to be pampered? He's out there working for a living--how about you do the same. Most men are not going to stop at a woman's boutique for any reason. Do that on your own, but it is time you 2 acted like a married couple (ie things are jointly owned).
A
female
reader, Mrs.Darcy  +, writes (28 July 2008):
 Firstly, I think you should stop comparing your husband to your father, No good can come of that. Sure there may be a similarity but if you campare the two you will only end up making your husband pay for all of your father's mistakes and very few men stick around when they are punished for someone elses mistakes.
So when you say he gives you "no" money what do you mean by that? Are the bills paid, living expenses, Groceries? Are you cared for in the sense that your needs are supplied and just not your wants? If he is not being sure your a fed and bills are paid then you need to confront this issue asap. But, from the fact that you put caps on the fact that you worked for a few months!! Honey maybe he's not the greedy one. My Dad used to work pulling in well over a 100 grand a year and other then my rent and utilities being paid I have been on my own since I was 12. I bought my own toiltries, food, clothing, entertainment. I had to babysit and do yard work for the neighbors, I did not get an allowence. If I took a job that was too far to walk to get to (4mi or more) I had to pay my parents to drive me. Working after school for a few months is not worthy of a caps, neither is my story, work may have four letters but it is not a four letter word.
I definately think you need to talk to your husband about this, especially since I may be totally off base and your husband may just not know how to be a husband yet, a few months is not long in a marriage and it takes years to learn how to really take care of each other. I've been married for five years and we are still figuring it out. Talk to him, tell him how you feel and see what he says, go from there.
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