A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I am feeling a bit confused right now. I have recently returned to my home town after an extended period away in America. I have met up with lots of old friends, including my old best friend. The problem is that I feel more than friendship for him now, and of course, he has a girlfriend. She is such a nice person, they seem very much in love.Whilst I am so happy for him, I'm finding it hard to act natural around them, like I feel as though I need to look away when they act 'coupley'. I feel slightly paranoid someone will pick up on it! So I guess my question is has anyone else been in similar situation? How did you get over that person (or at least cope with the siuation)? I know I cant be with him, thats just not possible. I really love spending time with him, so I dont really want that to end. Any help is greatly appreciated!! Thanks!
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, birdynumnums  +, writes (21 October 2008):
 Most of us feel the exact same way about PDA's, but it's harder when you have feelings for one of the people involved. I'm afraid that all you can do is grin and bear it, if you are going to remain friends. You could always try nipping it the bud by telling them to "Get a Room!" when they get lovey-dovey. That might make them realize that they making you uncomfortable, without letting the cat out of the bag.
You have been "BFF's" all along. If he should suspect that you have feelings for him, what is the worst that could happen? I can't imagine that he would stop being your friend (unless his girlfriend feels threatened and you have said that she is a nice person, so I doubt that she would suddenly turn into a raging bitch). Who knows, he might have had feelings for you all along, when you thought that you were "best friends", so, it may even be something that he would be open to hearing, if it did eventually come out. As much as this would be the fairy tale ending that you would be hoping for, it's more than likely that he is happy in his new life, and still regards you as his friend, so you will have to try to wrap your head around him knowing it and the fact that it won't be reciprocal. I guess there are always things in life that we can't change, but I don't think that it's worth worrying about or losing a friendship over. I'm sorry, Hunnie, that is a tough situation to be in and hard on your heart. If It becomes impossible for you, you may have to put a little distance between you and cool yourself and the friendship down. It's a difficult problem with no easy solution. XXX
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